


Taking Down the Wildebeest

by Rhonda



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Alcohol, Alternate Universe - High School, Electrocution, F/F, Football, Guns, Homophobia, Jasper is Neglected by Her Parents, Minor Violence, Trans Character, Transphobia, Unrealistic Depictions of 3D Printers, Vomiting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-19
Updated: 2015-08-15
Packaged: 2018-04-10 01:35:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 23,851
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4372064
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rhonda/pseuds/Rhonda
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jasper's beginning her first season as the starting quarterback for the BCH Seals. But home life and school aren't going so good. Can she find support in the form of the president of the robotics club?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A Read Letter Day

**Author's Note:**

> The wildebeest in the title is a metaphor for accepting things as they are.

Jasper was lying awake in bed. It was four thirty, school didn’t start for three hours. She rolled over and over in the little bed, but couldn’t get back to sleep.  She slid her heavy frame down the ladder to her bunk trying her best not to wake up Amethyst. She decided she would just add an hour and a half onto her morning jog. She slipped into her sweats and tied her cross trainers. As Jasper snuck into the living room she saw Onion on the floor quietly sanding a two by four into nothingness. They silently acknowledged each other, and Jasper stepped out into the bitterly cold misty morning. Jasper grinned, “Good.”

 

She stuck to the main roads where the city had best maintained its street lights. The sun wouldn’t rise for a while, today was the first day of winter quarter for Beach City High and it certainly felt like winter. Jasper was a junior, the starting quarterback for the BCH Seals. She had sunken her entire life into sports, and she loved every moment of it. During the off seasons in the past years she had played basketball and hockey; but this year she had given up on those, both for personal reasons and in order to focus on what she really loved: football.

Jasper was the only girl on the football team, not that the school didn’t have strong female athletics. Quite the contrary. Amethyst's softball team was nothing to sneeze at; that nervous wreck always managed to take her fencing club to state finals; and Garnet had represented Delmarva boxing at nationals two years in a row. Despite how much Jasper hated Garnet, she couldn’t deny her distinguished proficiency with punching.

Through the miasma she noticed that she had passed Amethyst's house, where she started. It had taken her seventy minutes to jog the whole perimeter of Beach City, she wanted to do it again in fifty. She sped up. She had been living under that roof for six months now. When Jasper’s father finally kicked her out, her best friend had immediately offered up her place. She was hesitant to accept, but Amethyst's adopted mother Vidalia had become quite insistent at the suggestion. Sour Cream had just graduated and left for the big city to follow his dreams of being a DJ so there was a free bunk open. Besides, Jasper and Amethyst had been friends since before either could remember. It was just that Jasper hated feeling dependant. It made her feel weak.

They eventually settled on an agreement, Jasper would let them house her, if they let her pull her weight around the house, literally for the most part. Vidalia’s husband was rarely in town and Jasper had volunteered to haul the artist’s supplies around her studio. Jasper tried to make herself useful in other ways, too. She took out the trash, drove Onion to tennis practice, used her own money to buy necessities. But despite all Jasper did to keep herself independent, Vidalia had endeavored to make the big girl part of the family.

Jasper was in front of Amethyst’s house again. She still had ten minutes left in her jog, but she decided to end it early. If she took a shower now, she could take her time with breakfast. When she stepped back into the slumbering house she noticed that Onion had disappeared leaving behind a large pile of sawdust. Jasper smelled herself, realizing she would have to confront her bare corpus, and by extension all of its flaws, in the mirror. Ugh, showers. Jasper dressed in the dark of Amethyst’s room. She made herself a glass of protein milk and looked for something to occupy her morning that didn’t involve LCDs. Call her old fashioned.

Jasper scooped up the sawdust pile into a small bowl, and dust busted what she couldn’t scrape out of the carpet. She left the bowl of reposed cellulose in Onion’s room, where he was also mysteriously absent. The kind of hands off parenting style that Vidalia implemented didn’t really appeal to Jasper, but it wasn’t her house or her kid. Still, Onion had really opened up to Jasper since she started living in the house, much to the surprise of his family. She barely understood a word of the bizarre dialect he spoke, but the fact that he spoke to her at all was supposed to be a big deal.

Jasper decided to spend the rest of her time by making Amethyst some breakfast. She was a very utilitarian cook at heart, which made her a “bad cook” by conventional standards. It didn’t phase Amethyst though, she would eat anything. Jasper prepared a french toast egg hash and pickle sandwich, one of Amethyst’s favorites. The sight of the finished meal in all its charred glory didn’t much appeal to Jasper either, but it wasn’t her stomach or her body.

Jasper poked Amethyst as she remembered that Amethyst hated being poked.

“Aww crap sorry, Amethyst, I forgot you didn’t like being poked.” Apologised Jasper to the contracting ball of bleached hair. “Either way, it’s time to get up.”

“I deserve this hell,” Amethyst muttered to herself as she curled up tighter.

Jasper grinned, “Come on It’s super cold and shitty outside, your favorite.”

“Noo, not my favorite,” whined the sphere. “My favorite is the warm embrace of the void.”

There was no arguing with her. Jasper simply left the obscene sandwich on her friend’s bedside table. Amethyst would find her own way to school and probably get there before the late bell rang. Jasper grabbed her letterman, gym bag, and backpack before walking out into the opaque grey mist.

Jasper was in homeroom. Her schedule for Winter quarter was fairly standard. Beach City High only had about four hundred students which didn’t leave room for anything overly exciting as most of the classes were focused on the basics. History, Math, Lunch, English, Art, Physics. Nothing really popped, she’d have to see how many of her friends had got randomly assigned into her classes.

History was a huge bust. Naturally everyone in the class knew _of_ her, she was the six foot four emancipated daughter of a millionaire who played football better than any of the boys in the school. And it was a small school so word got around fast. She’d have to make new friends. She prefered making enemies.

Math was full of teammates from football, not exactly people she considered friends and not exactly the kind of people who would make it easy to concentrate on the lecture. This irked her. She _needed_ to pass math, there was no other option. She also had to keep her teammates on her side, there was no archetype more predisposed to hate everything she was. This class would be a frustrating balancing act.

 

She sat at lunch with Amethyst, silently judging the other’s meal choice of three langasta helpings. Some of the utility friends she had made for History joined the table drowning out any chance of confiding her disappointment in the day so far to her close friend. Amethyst seemed to enjoy the company though, so the large woman simply sat at the center of the long lunch table serving as a brooding Christ for a high school cafeteria Last Supper. At this rate it she would make it someone’s last supper.

 

Jasper got her hopes up at the notion that she and Amethyst shared English together. Only to have them dashed by the fact it was being taught by Mrs. Quartz-Universe. A woman that Jasper despised with every fibre of her being. Years ago she had held a position of power within the district, from which she had endeavored to cut funding and privatize all of the extracurricular activities. Jasper’s mom had fought long and hard along with the rest of the PTA to keep sports in the school budget, but they ultimately lost the war. All the after school programs now had to go through some serious fund raising, or charge the students just to happen at all.

Jasper stepped into art, already expecting to be disappointed. The sight of Garnet and her wispy coadjutor greeted her from across the room. Maybe in the following weeks she would feel more up to harassing the two, but for now she just wanted to get to football practice.

Physics was the worst possible class to end a day with. High concept, Low interest. Jasper was relieved to find Sugilite was in the class with her. Sugilite was big and rough and lacked direction in life, her aggression and maliciousness would always find a way to make Jasper laugh. They chatted at the back of the classroom as it filled up with tired students. One strange sight caught the corner of her eye, causing her to double take. There was a girl she didn’t recognize, which was weird but it wasn’t what caused her to be noticed. She was a verdant fashion disaster. She was dressed all in lime green, from her head to her toes. She had profoundly thick glasses on a head that was covered by the most messy mop of nonsense hair that the world had ever seen. She was wearing a neon green button down with a bright bowtie, underneath a dark green pair of overalls. Where did she even get those? Was this a bit? Did she lose a bet? Jasper was stunned. She had never been more ready to bully, berate, and belittle. Shock was the only thing keeping her. Sugilite’s inhibitions were as small as her pension for wanton cruelty was large. She absolutely unleashed on the poor citris girl. Jasper covered her mouth with both hands in laughter as the short girl quietly ignored the barrage of insults and took a seat near the front.

“Dude you look like an asshole,” Jasper said grinning and struggling to breath as she laid her hand on Sugilite’s arm. Sugilite just gave her an incredulous look before leaning back into her chair quietly. At least today wasn’t a complete waste.

After school Jasper was approached by a nervous young man who she had recognised from the school play last year.

“Jasper?” he asked.

“That would be me, what do you want?”

“Hey, I work for the post office in town. We got a letter for ‘Jasper Diamond’ addressed to ‘somewhere in beach city.’ I thought that might be you. I tried getting your attention during lunch, but you were so spaced out you wouldn’t respond.”

Jasper hesitated.

“That _is_ my name,” she replied, “can I look at the return address?”

One glance and she pocketed the letter, she thanked the boy. She’d have to unpack that later. Both physically and emotionally.

She went to the gym and did weight training until practice started at five.

Football practice washed over all the bad feelings of the day.  It was mostly just logistics and schedules, but they did break for some skirmishes at the end of the night. Jasper was so relieved to be commanding a squad of men on the football field again.

Before she knew it practice was over and she was walking home. This quarter was certainly going to be a mixed bag, she already knew it. When she got home Amethyst was sitting on the couch in the living room munching on chips. Onion didn’t like eating in front of anyone if he could help it, so he had taken dinner into his room. Vidalia had been in her studio all day and wouldn’t probably leave for a few more. Jasper grabbed some fruit from the refrigerator and whipped up a healthy smoothie. She handed a glass to Amethyst and sat down next to her.

“Hey Jasper,” Amethyst said. “Real talk.”

“Okay,” Jasper wondered what kind of raw insight she was about to have access to.

Amethyst turned to Jasper, and swallowed a mouth full of fruit smoothie potato chip slurry.

“Did you ever notice how everyone in our grade is named after gemstones?”

Jasper paused, not expecting that. A silence fell over the two friends. It was true.

“Uhh,” she replied. “I guess they were just popular baby names when we were born.”

Amethyst mulled that explanation over, it seemed like it checked out.

“But hey, speaking of real talk,” Said Jasper as she produced the letter she had recieved after school, showing it to Amethyst.

“Oh, is that what Jamie was trying to hand you earlier? It it a love letter?” Amethyst teased until Jasper showed her the return address. “That’s your mother… are you going to open it?”

“I have to.”

“Do it.”

_Dear Jasper._

__

_I hope this finds you well. Please thank whomever has provided you with room and board over these past months on my behalf. Your father and I are seperated and I am currently living at my own beach house in town. I desire to meet with you for lunch 12:00 AM this Sunday at “The Crab Shack,” a local restaurant of low quality, but you know how this town is. Do not break any housing arrangements you have made._

_Love,_

_Yellow Diamond._

 


	2. Launch Date

The letter’s shade haunted the rest of the week. It was all Jasper thought about during her morning jogs, when she was working out in the gym, when she was in class, when she slept, when she slept in class. Her only respite was the grassy expanse of the football field. The team was coming together nicely and she thought they were ready for next week’s game, the first of the season.

So far she had managed to stay on top of her classes. Math was hard, but she was sure if she just kept up with the homework, she’d be able to socialize with her contemporaries while still receiving passing grades.

English had turned out alright, she could spend the workshopping section talking to Amethyst. Rose wouldn’t give a shit, as long as they didn’t interrupt her fifteen minute lecture at the start of every period. She was an unsurprisingly forgiving instructor, wrapping the entire classroom in nature posters and setting up a lounge area with beanbag chairs at the back. Her pretentious, condescending, and downright appropriative hippie ideals were a small price to pay if Jasper could relax and spend time with her best friend.

Rose was telling some boring anecdote about the healing powers of tears on Tuesday. Jasper had tuned it out after the first few words, glancing at Amethyst’s desk. She was playing that phone game about cookies again. It was cute enough, but Jasper didn’t find it challenging, so she gave up on it. She doodled over her notes from history.

“... And it’s times like these I think we should remember the old Native American saying…” droned Rose. Ugh, Jasper wasn’t a social justice warrior by any stretch of the word, but she couldn’t help but feel Rose borrowed a little too much from cultures she didn’t come from. Jasper was surprised she had named her kid Steven, rather than the Cree word for jelly bean or some other garbage.

“... And that actually reminds me of a funny story about Steven…” Speak of the devil. She’d met the kid before. He was friends with Onion and would come over to the house for occasional play dates, but Jasper never had any extended contact. The excited kids would always rush straight into Onion’s room to play with their dolls. Sometimes Rose would bring him to school. Jasper guessed he was homeschooled, seeing as he never really had any place to be. He’d just sit in the quad making friends with anyone who passed by. He was a cute kid. As much as Jasper disliked Rose Quartz-Universe, she didn’t want any ill to befall her spawn.

“... Anyway, that’s the week’s writing premise in a nutshell, now everyone go and expand your imagination! Don’t be afraid to come up and talk to me if you had any questions!” Finally. Jasper stretched and walked to the back of the room, Amethyst following her without looking up from her phone. Jasper cleared a few beanbags of their occupants and settled into the soft blob, sitting opposite her busy friend.

“So what are you going to write about?” Jasper inquired, hoping to get clue as to what the lecture was actually about.

“I’m not gonna know that till it’s due,” Amethyst replied glancing up from her game. Jasper should have expected that.

“I think I’ll do something about football,” she proposed.

“Unexpected,” Amethyst commented sarcastically. She frowned and put her phone on her lap before continuing, “Sorry, that’s a good idea. They say you should write what you know. Hey, you could write about that letter; that’s, like, full of drama.”

Jasper wasn’t mad, she just felt disrespected. Still, she had said much more insensitive stuff to Amethyst in the past. So, she resolved not to bring it up and instead continue the train of thought.

“I don’t know, it’s starting to be a major source of stress in my life. It’s been half a year since either of my parents talked to me. What do they want with me now?” Jasper had no idea what the reason for the sudden correspondence could be. Did she want to make up? No, there was no chance of that. Yellow Diamond would never admit fault. Was it just to catch up? Why didn’t she do it before? Jasper assumed there was something her mother wanted from her, but what? Amethyst picked up her phone and focused her attention back onto it.

“At least you know who your parents are.” Amethyst said dryly and without malice.

“What about Vidalia and Yellowtail?”

Jasper realized what Amethyst had meant by the time the sentence left her lips.

“Oh, sorry. I get what you mean, now.”

They sat quietly enjoying each other's company for the rest of the period, occasionally shooting quips back and forth. Jasper loved the short little doof more than she wanted to admit.

Art was more fun than she initially appraised, too. Garnet’s weird friend would always get into verbal altercations with Mr. Quartz-Universe about proper technique. It was a real joy to watch the second-in-command of her two greatest rivals going at it like that.

“I just don’t see how you can advocate loose lines,” the thin ginger complained on Wednesday. “Art is all about the fine detail, and if you’re going to teach it you need to focus on fixing the flaws in your students’ work.”

“Pearl, I’m not going to argue with you about this again,” replied Greg. “We need to the establish basics first. Drawing is all about working backwards from basic geometric shapes.”

“Ugh, shapes are just so… SO CHILDISH!” shouted Pearl as she stormed out of the room. Greg sighed and got up to go after her.

“Listen kiddos, I’ve gotta go deal with this. Just keep sketching the models,” he pointed to a row of children’s dolls standing on a block in the middle of the room.

Amethyst loved shapes, how was she ever childhood friends with that weirdo?

Jasper quickly realized she was functionally alone with Garnet. She grinned as she casually strode over to the tall black woman, pocketing an action figure called “Triangle GAL” on her way across the room. She’d gift it to Amethyst or Onion. The rest of the class dropped what they were doing to watch the coming altercation. Everyone knew about their rivalry. Twice before had they actually come to blows, once ending in Jasper’s favor; and once, after a much longer fight, Garnet had managed to take her down. Even though those fights felt like a lifetime ago, Jasper was ready for round three. Here was the chance to get out some of her letter based aggression.

“Your girlfriend sounds really upset, don’t you think you should go console her?” Jasper said in a mock concerned tone.

“Pearl is not my girlfriend.” Garnet replied monotonously in her beautiful british accent, without looking up from her sketchbook.

“Really?” Said Jasper now mocking surprise. “I’ve seen the way she looks at you. I’m honestly amazed you haven’t tapped that yet, you massive homo.”

“I’m aromantic,” said Garnet in the same voice. After a pause she added in a much less controlled tone, “and you’re one to talk.” Jasper snickered, she was getting through much faster than she thought she would. Garnet must want this as badly as she did. She lewdly leaned her body deep into the personal space of the seated woman.

“Hey, at least I’m comfortable with my place in the community, baby,” She said as she reached to place her arm on Garnet’s shoulder. In one swift movement she slapped Jasper’s hand away, pushed her back, and stood up adopting a wide fighting stance. Her book and stool clattered to the ground. Jasper grinned wider.

“You got some kinda problem with me, darling?” Jasper taunted. Garnet adjusted her sunglasses, her scowl deepening. Another pause.

“Yes.”

“Then come over here, let’s talk it out.” Jasper threw her palms up and arms wide stepping forward. “Best two out of three, you know?” The hint of a smile flashed across Garnet’s face.

A noise caused the whole room to turn. It was Greg, he was back with the wisp.

“Uhh, what’s going on here?” he asked. Pearl was much quicker on the uptake and was in between them in a heartbeat.

“Back away from her you brute.” She said, wielding her pencil like a dueling smallsword. The sight made Jasper break out in laughter.

“Hey don’t worry, man. It’s nothing. I just wanted to complement Ms. Square on her sketch work, is all.” She said trying to catch her breath, more to Mr. Quartz-Universe than to Pearl. With that she turned and strutted back to her stool. She sketched the remaining “models” occasionally glancing across the room. Pearl met her gaze on Garnet’s behalf. Garnet herself had neatly returned to sketching as though nothing had happened. Another day, perhaps.

Physics had been the capper to great schooldays. The material still bored her, but the lime green nerdlinger served as more than enough entertainment. She quickly learned that her name was Peridot. She’d wear a similar green nonsense outfit each day, but it was never the same kind of trainwreck, so it hadn’t yet lost its novelty. Jasper was sure she had to be doing it on purpose. She would always speak up to correct the teacher or ask questions in that glorious squeak of a voice. The cadence of her voice was like a sitcom, like she learned english via pop cultural osmosis alone. Sugilite would not relent on the poor girl. To her credit, Peridot seemed to hold her own. But bullying was the only way that Sugilite could feel powerful, she was a pro and not good at much else. Jasper would have felt sorry for poor little Peridot, if she had any time in between guffaws. The class was like a daily Abbott and Costello sketch, if they hated each other and Abbott was a ruthless monster. It was great.

The class divided into groups for what could laughably be called a “lab” on Thursday. It wasn’t a lab so much as it was a six page excuse for the teacher to nap at their desk. Jasper had been assigned to the same group as good old green girl, and it was also Sugilite-free. This was her own exciting opportunity to calmly pick the brain of Beach City High’s most wanted, find out what made her tick. Sugilite just rolled her eyes and gave an exasperated look as she saw the lab bench Jasper was heading to. Jasper giggled at the display as she sat down next to the nerd.

Peridot flinched at the sight of her. Jasper immediately lost her smile. Intimidating Garnet was one thing, but being a source of fear to someone so small and weak didn’t feel good at all. She shook the thought out of her head.

“Hey, I’m Jasper. I don’t think we’ve been formally introduced,” she said, her slasher smile returning as she stuck her hand out to be shaken. Peridot looked very hesitant to accept the greeting, so she lowered her arm. “Hey it’s fine. There are people I don’t wanna touch, too.”

“It’s not that I don’t want to touch you,” Peridot said, looking slightly offended. “It’s just that you hang out in the back with that... thing,” she qualified, glancing at Sugilite.

“Oh, her?” Jasper played dumb, “She doesn’t mean anything by it.”

“I highly doubt that.”

“Well, yeah she means a lot by it. But that’s not what I meant. What I meant to say was that she herself doesn’t mean anything,” Jasper ad libbed, she wanted Peridot to trust her so that she could find out more about the hilarious weirdo. “Seriously look at her, does she look like someone who’s going places?” They both turned to look at Sugilite in her ratty denim vest grumbling at the smarter people she’d been assigned to work with. Peridot giggled. “She’s all form with no function, she’s not in any sports or extracurricular activities, and she’s barely passing her classes. She looks at someone like you and feels inferior, so she does what she knows: verbal harassment.”

“Then why do you laugh at her bullying?” Peridot squeaked. Jasper had to think about that one for a second. She padded her time by leaning in, acting as though she was going to reveal a major secret. Peridot bought it.

“It’s… It’s just that I know she can’t truly hurt you,” she whispered laughing to herself at the line she’d come up with.

Peridot looked her directly in the eyes.

“That’s not true, I go in the bathroom to cry after school every day.” Peridot whispered back.

Jasper’s grin disappeared again. Was she really so hurt? Why was she telling her this? So blunt. Did Peridot really believe she cared? Jasper’s gut rolled over and she felt weak for the first time in six months. This Peridot was really hurting, and she was complacent in the harassment, if not an active participant. It was true, her laughter had spurred Sugilite on. She was mad, so mad. She reached out for the only tactile action available to her and made a decision.

“Hey Sugilite, come over here,” she called. Peridot stiffened and Sugilite looked over hungrily. Both reactions only hardened Jasper’s resolve. Sugilite was big for a girl, but she was still half a foot shorter than the Quarterback she approached.

As a smile formed on Sugilite’s mouth Jasper calmly, neatly, and powerfully channelled every discordant emotion from the past week into a single clean punch.

Sugilite was on the ground, bleeding. Jasper turned to see a cowering Peridot with fear in her eyes.

_Suspended on the first week of school, are you proud of me yet dad?_

Honestly she should have been expelled. Sugilite’s jaw was in pieces, and had to be driven to an out-of-town hospital. Jasper didn’t regret what she had done. She felt like she should. She was just as much a part of hurting Peridot, and had projected her own blame onto Sugilite.

However she did feel truly bad for getting off with only a two day suspension, and that included the day she’d helped a battered Sugilite into an ambulance. She got off super light, all because of who she was and who the person she’d attacked was. She had earned much worse. Her privilege had gotten her off, and it infuriated Jasper.

All Jasper knew was violence. She had that in common with Garnet. When they had fought, it was an even fight more or less. So the light sentencing then was excusable. But now... She couldn’t stop thinking about the feeling in her hand and the noise Sugilite’s face made in that moment. How she just… dropped. Sugilite may have been an irredeemable aggressive goon, but she didn’t stand a chance and deserved real justice.

There was no sense in moping at the failings of society, it had already failed them both in many other ways.

She grabbed her stuff and walked to Friday practice. Technically she wasn’t supposed to participate in any extracurricular activities, but the team needed her, Coach Smiley knew that. Besides, the football team received no financial support from the school, thanks to Rose Quartz-Universe. She wondered if she’d be bitter and vindictive like Rose when she got to her age. Jasper probably wouldn’t get to Rose’s age. Her demographic had a high murder rate, which probably wasn’t helped by her aggressive personality. Being beefy wasn’t a good protection against a gun or a knife. Maybe Garnet’s hanger-on had the right idea with all that fencing. Maybe she was right about a lot of things.

If that didn’t get her, football concussions would. Especially if she continued to play like she did that night. She ran every ball. Barreled through defensive lines like they weren’t there. She wanted to break something in her. She took every tackle as hard as she could. It felt like penance. Coach Smiley would call for her to stay back, or hand it off, or take a knee. Jasper wouldn’t listen, she wanted to feel the rush of head on head combat. One particularly strong hit popped her helmet off, and on her way down a stray knee took to her face. It wasn’t the first time her nose had broken. She had gotten her wish.

She was alone in the girl’s locker room, having refused medical aid. She looked at herself naked in a full length mirror. Long bleached hair, modeled after her best friend. Amber eyes, a gift from her mother, along with the birthmarks that striped her face and arms and torso. The small misshapen nose still tender with blood tracing through same lines that the shower water had taken. The metalic taste of rust in liquid form. It flowed down her front. Down her breasts, her abs, her crotch.

She was going to be a career footballer, everyone said so. She was supposed to be the first woman to play in the NFL. Looking in the mirror she didn’t feel like much of a woman.

She spilled her guts to Amethyst who just looked awkward, before hugging her and telling her that she was beautiful.

“Oh, that reminds me,” Jasper changed the subject after realizing she was incapable of crying the feelings out. She reached into her backpack.

“It’s not another letter is it?” Amethyst teased. Remembering the Letter only made Jasper feel worse. But, there was no way Amethyst could have know that it would, right?

“No... no, it’s gift,” she said pulling Triangle Gal out of the main pocket. “I meant to give you this a few days ago.”

“Oh my god, it’s a… Triangle?” Amethyst’s eyes lit up realizing what it was. “Onion has one of these, I think. I always wanted one to go on top of my triangle pile. Where’d you get it?”

“Well Pearl was bad mouthing shapes, so I thought I’d be a good neighbor and nab it before she did anything to the poor Gal.” Jasper realized she shouldn’t have brought up Pearl as soon as she did. She apologised. Amethyst drooped for a moment before springing back to life for Jasper’s sake.

“Come on, watch me stack it.” Amethyst pulled the doors to her abnormally large closet open. When she placed the doll on top of the jumble of similar shapes, an Image flashed through Jasper’s head. It was of Peridot with her weird unnatural triangle hair sitting grumpily in the toy’s place.

Jasper couldn’t stop laughing at the thought. She curled up on the floor much to the confusion of Amethyst. There’s no way she’d understand even if she explained it. The laughter felt unearned but it wouldn’t stop. She just accepted it. It felt good.

She spent Saturday at Onion’s youth tennis tournament. Although she’d never admit it, it was nice to feel like a part of a family event today. Onion was good, too. He made up for his size with a breakneck speed that dazzled the crowd and helped him beat opponents twice his height. She chatted with Amethyst and her mom between games. She had managed to forget about all the trouble she was in.

Onion lost the final game against a young Indian girl, but not by much. Silver medal around his neck, Onion rode on Jasper’s shoulders all the way to boardwalk. They went for ice cream and Onion got a rainbow sorbet, Amethyst picked three scoops of an exotic artichoke bacon blend, and Vidalia got herself a cup of vanilla.

“I don’t know how you guys can eat that gunk,” Jasper teased. “It’s so bad for you.”

“Learn to live a little Jasper,” Amethyst replied. Jasper felt like she needed to live a little less. “And hey, Onion’s not eating his.” It was true, Onion swirled the colors of the sorbet together until it was a dull blueish grey. He said something that Vidalia had to translate as he held the cold finger against his cheek.

“He says he’s gonna grow up to be big like you, Jasper.” The sappy-ness of the moment really got to her. She’d later regret giving into the melodrama of the scene.

Her Sunday morning run was as hard as she could make it. She looped the the city five times before her legs simply gave out. She wasn’t built for distance. She was a firework, designed to close a short distance fast just to deliver a large bang. The pain in her legs from running for three hours would allow her to mask the anxiety of the afternoon’s meeting. She grit her teeth through a shower. She had to look nice.

She put on a tight black cocktail dress and worked for half an hour to make it bulge in all the right places. She spent the next half hour getting her winged eyeliner right. She debated using makeup to cover the large bruise on and around her nose, but ultimately decided against it. Yellow Diamond would know about her injury. Her mom hated fakes and anyone who tried to hide the truth about themselves. To finish the ensemble she slipped into a pair of black loafers and donned a bright necklace with the gemstone that was her mother’s namesake. It was a birthday gift from her last year. Part of her didn’t want to wear it, because of what it symbolized. She ultimately decided to wear it. The thing was just too pretty to leave off.

She scooped her hair up into a ponytail on her way out the door, almost as an afterthought. In these shoes with these exhausted legs she’d have to drive. She unlocked her burnt orange ‘70 Dodge Charger, a sweet sixteen gift from her father. As she pulled out of the garage, she felt like arriving with adorned all this parental memorabilia would imply a lot she that didn’t want to. But it was too late for that. She pulled up at the Crab Shack at eleven fifty, noting the all the empty parking spaces. Her mom probably rented the whole place out. She waved at a driver lounging in the front of a limousine parked before the door, but was sad to see that he wasn’t any of the ones she remembered from her childhood.

The matradee lead her to the main dining room. Mom really went full tyrant on the wait staff.  The room was nearly empty except for a single two person table in the center. In the corner sat a man quietly playing neo-classical piano music. Jasper had only ever been to the Crab Shack once, but she hadn’t remembered a piano player, or a piano at all for that matter. She did remember lots of kitschy tat hung on the walls. It looked as though her mom had ordered all the wall trappings replaced with tasteful contemporary art. She recognised some of the pieces from the Diamond’s private collection. The room was a blight of sheer excess.

In the center of the room sat Yellow Diamond herself. She motioned for Jasper to sit down. She did. The chair was tight and uncomfortable. Yellow Diamond broke eye contact first by picking up the menu. Jasper looked down at her own, but didn’t have enough time to make her selection before her mother summoned the waitress. She ordered a vegetarian spring salad, reading off the first thing that sounded palatable.

“I will have the Thai Seafood Fusion.” Ordered Yellow Diamond. Jasper hated fusion. She waited for the server to leave before she turned to her daughter. “It is a pleasure to see you, Jasper. Honestly it’s been too long.” She said.

“And who’s fault is that?” Snarked Jasper.

“Your father,” she answered not skipping a beat. “He’s gone now.”

“Did you divorce him or did you fire him?”

“Diamond Industries caught him committing a gross misallocation of company resources.” Was the only answer that Jasper got. Their food arrived. Either Yellow Diamond had anticipated what her daughter would order, or simply had the staff prepare one of everything on the menu. Either explanation was plausible.

“Good, now we can get to business,” she said as their food was placed on the table. “I originally had different intentions for our little reunion. In light of certain recent events however…” she paused, lazily waving at Jasper’s face. “Well, let’s be curt. I intended to provide you with some money, not enough that you would move out of your current housing arrangement, but an amount that would insure you could contribute so as you wouldn’t be considered a freeloader. As well as some leftover to spend on whatever you wished, a gift from me.”

“I’m no freeloader, I work my ass off in that house.” Jasper snapped.

“Of course you do, you’re a Diamond. You’ve got more of me in you than your father, anyone can see that,” she replied, calm as ever. “It’s just this incident with…”

“Sugilite,” Jasper finished for her.

“Yes. You see, it reflects badly on me. On us. I decided that I needed to do some community outreach.”

“Wait a second,” said Jasper, putting pieces together wasn’t her strong suit. “You’re the reason I only got suspended for two days! That girl is in the hospital because of me, and you waved your money and privilege to get me with nothing more than a slap on the wrist!”

“It’s true, I still have more power in the school district than Rose Quartz knows. I care about your education so much, Jasper.” Yellow Diamond responded, showing a hint of real emotion in the second sentence. “Still you shouldn’t sell yourself short, the staff at the school loves you.They were only planning on a four day suspension before I stepped in.”

Jasper felt used, it wasn’t an unfamiliar feeling. Before she moved in with Amethyst, her parents would always play her as a pawn in their dealings. Both with each other and the community.

Yellow Diamond continued, “So, I found myself in a position where I had an excess of money, no deserving candidate and only a few days to find one. You’d be surprised how often life finds a way of providing a solution. I hadn’t expected one to literally show up on my doorstep, and yet...” She laughed. It was a soft and sharp laugh that brought Jasper a mixed platter of emotions. Yellow Diamond waited for a response that never came. “It was a young woman from the high school’s robotics team going door to door looking for donations, of all things, Jasper.”

“Oh no,” Jasper muttered involuntarily. “So you decided to spend my living money on a club?”

“Yes,” her mother smiled. “Diamond industries has decided to sponsor the Beach City High Robotics Team, to the tune of fifty thousand dollars.”

Jasper stood up, her chair tipping over from the brisk motion. The pianist stopped at the commotion, but Yellow Diamond waved for him to continue.

“So you brought me here. To tell me. That you took fifty thousand out of your offshore bank account. Just so that you could decidedly not spend it on me.” Jasper was seething.

“Oh, but that’s the thing, dear girl. I did spend it on you.” Jasper was confused. “God damn it, you might have got my heart, but you certainly have your father’s wits. You are going to join the Robotics team,”

It was not a request, Jasper opened her mouth to protest. “Don’t worry it wont interfere with football. Just apply those skills you use to keep that jalopy you drive in one piece. Oh, and make sure to have fun.”

Jasper fumed, she paced around the room searching for something to say. There was no arguing, she knew that.

She eventually cooled down, realizing she was completely cornered. If she did this she might get the money anyway. “Fine. If it will make you happy.”

“I’m sure you’ll have a good time, the team captain is a new student this year. You’ll like her though, she dresses in the most silly little green outfits.”

 


	3. These Flings Just Sort of Happen

Jasper and Garnet were swinging at each other. Garnet dodged and Jasper blocked. Jasper’s body knew the steps of this dance all too well. She’d throw Garnet by her arms and run at her, but she would always get up and turn Jasper’s charge. Jasper would push the fight out into the school’s parking lot. Garnet would break Jasper’s sunglasses and throw her into the school’s electrical transformer where she’d conk out.

This time her body broke through the box’s green metal casing. She watched her body shake up as ten thousand amps stopped her heart and set her hair on fire. It was pain without end. Even after she was dead the hot sharp pain swept through her veins.

They held the funeral right there, they couldn’t separate her melted flesh from the wires that engulfed her. Everyone she knew was there. Yellow Diamond and Peridot stepped to the front. They was crying and holding hands. Yellow Diamond looked her daughter right in the face and beeped loudly right into her ear.

Jasper woke up from the nightmare with a bad taste in her mouth and gently tapped the alarm. Her morning routine already felt automated even though it had only been a week. School was as dull as it should be. She could barely keep herself awake through her morning classes.

Rose Quartz prattled with some anecdote about how Steven was mad that Greg lost a toy of his, and that this week’s writing assignment would be about loss.

“Are you going to write about how you lost 50K?” asked Amethyst at the back of the classroom, doodling across a blank piece of paper.

“It’s not really loss if I never actually had it,” Jasper replied.

“What about your loss of dignity now that you’re spending all your free time on nerd crap.”

“To be honest, I don’t really care what other people think about me. I’m already more popular then I want to be.” Jasper frowned. If she had lost her dignity, it was her own doing. She rightly felt deeply responsible for the whole fiasco. Paying for it by spending a few hours after school and watching her inheritance burn away wasn’t exactly the worst way to atone.

She didn’t have the energy to bother Garnet during art, but Pearl seemed really excited about something. What did she have to be excited about? There hadn’t been a new innovation in sword technology since the 1590’s.

Jasper spent physics sitting as far in the back as she could, trying to hide under a hoodie. Her sheer size and the bright letterman jacket gave her away like a beacon. No one approached her, but they all stared. She remembered that her nose was still crooked and swollen, discolored skin overlapping discolored skin. She must have looked great.

And there was her new best friend, at the front of the class, verdant as ever. Scuttling away with a pen and pad, barely paying attention to the lecture at all. She wondered how receptive she’d be to her presence at the club. They hadn’t really interacted much. Jasper remembered the look on her face when she had knocked out Sugilite. It was terror, but the terror was cut with something else. Was it vindication? It didn’t look like it, but that was the only other emotion that made sense. She couldn’t imagine Peridot would be all too excited at having a monster like her that close. At the very worst she’d have to explain that her presence was a hidden condition of accepting the recent funding. She wouldn’t even need to talk to her if she didn’t want. A silent assistant, the eyes of the benefactor, an escort.

The bell rang, she’d wait to leave after Peridot. She didn’t want to look like she was following her.

She was in front of the door to the shop room. Somehow Jasper had butterflies in her stomach. She took a deep breath, remembered who she was, remembered who they were, and opened the door. The room was full of tools, much as Jasper had remembered it. Tall thick wooden work tables and chains suspending engine blocks in various states of repair. Rows of tools, powered and unpowered, secured along the walls. Blueprints and instruction books for technologies across the ages.

At the other end of the room two short thin women stood around a laptop. One was Peridot, naturally. The other figure seemed familiar. As they both turned around in response to Jasper’s entrance, the movement of Peridot’s companion gave away her identity just as much as the massive beak centered squarely on her oval face. It was Garnet’s little compatriot, Pearl. Good to know that she wasn’t going to be the club member with the most fucked up nose. There was a brief silence; surprise followed by a mix of emotions across the small pale faces that stared from the other side of the room. Jasper broke the silence.

“I’m here to join the robotics club,” she said plainly.

“Oh! Absolutely not!” came the response she had expected from Pearl.

“Now, let’s not be so hasty,” said Peridot nervously. Now that was unexpected.

“You can’t seriously be considering this! I know, you know who that is, it’s the one I’ve been telling you about!” Pearl had never shied away from dehumanizing Jasper, even when she was around. Jasper walked over to the bickering couple.

“Hey, I think she could be useful, I mean… look at her,” said Peridot side eyeing the stoic footballer. A pause, a silence, a cough of attention from Pearl. Peridot returned her focus to the ginger ballerina. “Jasper is… strong. She can heave all the big shipments we’re getting this week.” Pearl was not having it.

“Listen,” Jasper interrupted. “I want to join the Club. I have mechanical experience from working on cars and, like she said, I can lift heavy equipment with these babies.” Jasper flexed her arms in a triumphant pose, impressive despite the thick layers of cloth and leather that obscured her biceps. “Besides, seeing as there’s only two of you, it doesn’t seem like you’re in much of a position to be denying help.”

Pearl huffed. Peridot was spaced out again.

“Stop staring at me,” said Jasper. The way Peridot was looking at her made Jasper uncomfortable. Peridot comically shook out her head and apologized. Jasper accepted it. “So, what’s the plan? What kind of robot are we building today?”

“You don’t have any idea how Robotics Team works, do you?” scoffed Pearl.

“Obviously not.”

“Well, it’s a competitive format. We build a robot that can navigate a complex series of obstacles on its own. They are judged on speed and efficiency. I’ve spent the last few days charting out work schedules and due dates, while Peridot has been scrambling to redraw blueprints based off of recent… developments.”

“I haven’t slept in three days,” added Peridot with stars in her eyes, pointing at a tall energy drink next to her laptop. Ugh. Jasper took a closer look at Peridot’s face, she indeed had massive bags under her small eyes, but she hadn’t noticed them until now. That was because she entirely covered them up with pale foundation and thick glasses. Jasper had certainly not taken Peridot as someone who used makeup, but supposed it followed since she apparently spent so much time making outfits so thoughtfully uncoordinated. “I recently got a massive donation straight from the CEO of Diamond Industries!”

“Peridot!” Pearl snapped. “We were supposed to keep that from getting out.”

“But Jasper’s a team member now. She should know we’ve got fifty grand.” Peridot waited for a reaction from Jasper.

“Wow,” she lied.

“Anyway,” Peridot continued. “The only limit for us is my own imagination at this point. Come over here let me show you the plaaaans.” She waved at her laptop. Jasper leaned in to look over the heads of the shorter women. “It’s an articulated radial frame that will be programmed via a hybrid neural network of my own design. It has extendable legs to move over uneven terrain, but an interior gyroscope that will allow for quick unimpeded rotational movement across level planes. There’s a multi-chambered interior that can support a dynamic variety of tools. It has light and sound sensors all across the chassis, which will be made of a combination titanium carbon fiber. It uses microprocessors and specially designed parts to fit everything into a small one foot diameter sphere. It’s the next evolution of competition robotics. I call it the Faceted Lightweight All-purpose Sensory Kinetic Robotic Spherenoid, or Flapskrs!” Peridot concluded her shpiel and appealed to the women staring at her.

There was a brief silence. Jasper was impressed, her mom had put her faith in the right weirdo. She imagined the Diamond Industries logo utop a winner’s podium, plastered across the side of this Flapskrs. She had do something about that name though.

“Hey, that Flapskrs doesn’t really roll of the tongue, what if we call it a Robonoid?” asked Jasper. Peridot seemed excited someone was so interested.

“The Flapsk Robonoid?”

“All-purpose will be one word. Just Flask. Flask Robonoid.”

“Are you really gonna let it just change the name we came up with?” whined Pearl.

“I really like Flask Robonoid, though,” answered Peridot with a smile. “Jasper’s already proving herself a lovely addition to the team.”

“Pearl,” Jasper turned to the stick woman. “If we’re going to be on a team, you need to stop calling me an it. I’m a normal girl just like you or Peri here.” Peridot blushed at the nickname.

“You’ll forgive me if I don’t see things that way, Jasper,” coldly replied Pearl. Jasper wanted to threaten her, but that would probably just prove her point. She supposed that being dehumanized was going to be part of her punishment. She was glad that Peridot didn’t seem to hate her. Quite the opposite, she seemed more than eager to make friends with Jasper, which was completely counterintuitive to their last interaction.

At their next physics class Peridot arrived before Jasper and sat a few rows behind from her usual spot. Jasper figured this was a compromise between the back and the front of the class. It seemed like she was her only friend left in this class after brutally assaulting the last one, so she sat next to the little green nerd. Little was the wrong word. Peridot was a regular height for a regular girl, it was just that normal people seemed so small to Jasper. She wasn’t that thin either, at least compared to Pearl who was a waif of a woman. Peridot was a bit plump in a traditionally feminine way and had almost no muscles to speak of, again much unlike Pearl who had stringy, tight flesh from years of ballet and fencing.

Peridot was aggressively passive in the burgeoning friendship. Jasper assumed it must have been nerves. She always had to be the one asking questions and engaging the conversation.

“So do you have any hobbies?” Jasper asked. A tired question.

“Well, I like video games. I like this one about building things out of blocks…” Peridot prattled on about video games. Jasper neither much cared for videos nor games. There was a time she did, but it was long past. “... but the way that they handled the latest expansion was real bullshit, so I don’t play it much anymore. What about you?”

“I spend most of my free time working out at the gym, but honestly I don’t have much free time anymore.” This was how their conversations would go. Jasper would ask a cliched question and Peridot would reply with a long winded explanation. Then she’d say “what about you?” and Jasper would give a short response. Then silence as Peridot eagerly awaited Jasper’s next question. It was like the worst date ever, except there wasn’t even any food.

On their way to the machine shop Peridot wouldn’t stop staring at Jasper’s face. Jasper was bothered, but she still wasn’t in a position to feel moral about telling the smaller woman off.

“Did it, hurt?” she asked. It was an insensitive question, but it wasn’t one she would shy away from.

“Yes,” answered Jasper plainly. Peridot looked disappointed at such a brief response. “But pain is just weakness leaving the body,” she added. It was an old saying, but she believed it.

“Oh…” replied Peridot. She looked awkward as if she had expected more to the exchange. Jasper didn’t know what to give her so they proceeded in silence to the machine shop where Pearl was standing at attention with a clipboard.

“Good to see you’re here Peridot, we got both the laser cutter and the three dimensional printer today,” she said pointing at two enormous wooden crates sitting in the middle of the autobody section of the shop.

_Express order, why not spend her money on that?_

“Hey, shouldn’t there be, like, a teacher here or something?” Jasper asked.

“Oh you’re still here, are you?” came the only answer she would get from Pearl. Peridot seemed more inclined to clear up any confusion.

“The shop guy only works fall and spring so we’ve got the key, and besides we’ve got you to lift heavy things,” answered Peridot with a smile. “Why don’t you get to work unpacking the crates while Pearl and I install the drivers for the equipment?”

Jasper did as she was told. As she surveyed the crates she found that behind them was a similarly sized assortment of crates and boxes. Some were flat and wooden containing meter length sheets of carbon nanofibre and titanium, others were large cardboard cubes that seemed to contain assorted metal joints and motors and batteries, stacked on top of those were diminutive finely packaged boxes of specialized parts and other assorted gizmos.

She looked over at her teammates, they were chatting amiably around Peridot’s laptop. Peridot didn’t seem to have any trouble talking to Pearl. Was she really just nervous around Jasper? That would seem in line with Jasper’s own perception of herself, but Peridot _did_ seem to genuinely want to spend time with her.

She seemed to be the skittish type, maybe it was just that she was in her element here. The machine room offering a different kind of channeled confidence. Or maybe it was that the two had a thing for each other. Pearl was certainly gay enough for that to be a valid theory. Jasper didn’t know about Peridot, but she supposed anything was possible these days. Ugh, but Pearl, though. She was cute enough yet her personality was so abrasive, what would Peridot see in her? The whole thought rubbed Jasper the wrong way.

Jasper was done disassembling the two largest crates and moved the humongous industrial machines into open areas along the wall. They wouldn’t be used up when the team finished building their Robonoid, and Peridot certainly didn’t intend to take the massive equipment home with her. Jasper supposed they were just a donation to the school on behalf of Peridot on behalf of The Robotics Team on behalf of Diamond Industries on behalf of Yellow Diamond. Yeah, but Yellow Diamond only donated the money on behalf of Jasper on behalf of Sugilite on behalf of Peridot. Jasper snickered. Jasper turned her attention on the rest of the supplies.

An hour passed and folded sheets of cardboard and empty crates were stacked in the corner when Jasper had finished unboxing all of the other raw materials and parts. Pearl was still sorting all of the motorized joints by ball or hinge and Jasper figured she’d leave her to it. Noticing that she was idle Peridot called her over.

“I got the ultra fine 3D printer working! Check it out!” The excitement in her voice was palpable. Inside the large modern ergonomic machine several robot arms swiveled back and forth along a track. They were slowly building and finely constructing a small trinket out of the high impact poly-something resin that Peridot had sunk a few grand into. As the layers stacked, the bottom of the artefact was revealed to be a tiny figurine of a football player. He had a ball in his hand and was posed as though ready to push through a tackle. When his head finally formed out of thin air he couldn’t have been taller than Jasper’s middle finger. Peridot quickly reached in and handed the little figurine to Jasper. She didn’t know what to say.

“You made me a pocket running back?” Jasper said finally. She didn’t really know how to feel, either.

“Yep,” Peridot replied with a large grin. “How do you like it? I didn’t have much time so it’s mostly based on an open source model I got online, but I did do some modifications last night!” She was very pleased with herself. Jasper took a closer look at the sport poppet. He was all white hard plastic, with incredibly fine definition from the leggings to the ball to the chest to the face, though some aspects had been clearly altered away from a generic football toy. The toy had a more womanly figure than most traditional football players. The clearly defined face behind the helmet’s mask, had a crooked nose and large eyelashes. But the biggest give away was her Jersey, on the back an embossed twelve sat just below the name: Diamond.

_And Jasper thought she didn’t know how to feel before._

“It’s… a little me?”

“YES!” She had never seen anyone this excited before.

“How did you know my number?”

“I saw you guys practicing the other day,” she said like it was no big deal. It really wasn’t, but it still unsettled Jasper.

“You watched me practice?” Jasper said harshly. Peridot’s smile wavered. There was a pause. Jasper felt bad. “You made me a running back, why?” she asked, with a softer inflection.

“I thought you were one. I saw you running the ball over and over again smashing through other players,” she replied.

“You were watching me on Friday? Why?” Jasper was more confused than anything.

“Yeah, I watched you on Friday, okay?” Peridot’s smile was all but gone. Jasper just stood there waiting for the answer to the implicit question. Peridot caved. “After Thursday everyone was coming to me to ask about what happened. I felt bad for talking about it, but they just kept pressing me, so I went to football practice after robotics to try and touch base with you. I tried getting your attention from the sideline but you couldn’t seem to hear anything and when you got hurt I had to go. You were bleeding everywhere and I can’t stand the sight of blood, okay?”

“Oh, I’m sorry.” Jasper was at a loss for words again. “For the record, I don’t mind you talking about me. People’ll gossip about it anyway.” There was a visible sign of relief on Peridot’s face. “Also, thank you. This figurine is a really sweet gift.” Peridot’s smile shakily returned. “I’m about to go to practice now, do you wanna come watch me again?” she teased.

“As much as I enjoy watching you work, the raw athletics of training isn’t exactly my cup of tea,” Peridot replied sheepishly.

“Alright, see you tomorrow,” Jasper said leaving. Peridot waved.

That interaction was confusing. What exactly was she to Peridot and why had she made a model of her?

Jasper considered an entirely new possibility. Perhaps Peridot simply had a crush on Jasper herself. Was the thought so far fetched? All the evidence seemed to confirm this notion. Jasper wasn’t exactly bad looking, at least in a broad sense. Despite her current facial damage, she still had a thick, muscular, fit, and feminine body. But was Jasper ready for a relationship again? God, she hadn’t been with anyone since Lapis.

She didn’t want to think about that now. She didn’t want to think about that ever.

Jasper was giving the figurine a simple paint job in Art class on Wednesday. She painted the uniform and the birthmarks, but left the rest of the skin a pale white, not wanting to mess up the detail on the face with her clumsy brushwork. Peridot was still on her mind, more than she’d have liked. The nerd had a cute face, there was no denying it. On one hand, she probably gorged daily on Doritos and Mountain Dew, but on the other hand she was deeply passionate about her interests and could talk about them for hours. On one hand they had absolutely nothing in common with each other, but on the other hand Jasper felt more desperate for companionship now than in any other point in her life. On one hand there were the stupid bowties she wore, but on the same hand those bowties were adorkable. Adorkable, there was no better word to describe all of what Peridot was.

She looked over at Pearl chattering away at Garnet, it was a certainty that they had talked about her since joining the club. It was even more certain that they’d talk if she started dating Peridot, everyone would. Jasper never minded when people talked about her, they always did. But if she asked Peridot out and was wrong about her. Rejection from Peridot would be genuinely embarrassing.

Peridot seemed more inclined to hold her own in their physics conversation today. They were still unable to find any common interests, but not for a lack of trying. Peridot would ask about videogames, cartoon shows, websites, conventions, but none of it seemed familiar to Jasper. She was beginning to worry that she didn’t have any hobbies, and whether that made her boring.

Their only common ground was the Robotics Club itself. They’d continue their non-conversations through physics and into the machine room. Peridot would talk about her plans for the Flask Robonoid to the room at large, Jasper and Pearl commenting whenever they became too unrealistic. Both the short women would spend the time finely assembling the machine based on the blueprints that Peridot had developed. Jasper had been relegated to feeding sheets of thin titanium to the laser cutter and flipping through social media on her phone. Later she’d find herself riveting together the inner chassis. She still didn’t have the technical proficiency that the other two did, which kept her from working with the electronics. They were making incredible time according to Pearl.

“All the more time to train the little Robo,” said Peridot in response to this revelation. All three women were working around the same large shop table.

“Wait, what do you mean train it?” asked Jasper. “You mean like a dog?”

“Sort of,” replied Peridot. “The AI I’ve been developing is based on a custom hybridized neural network.” Seeing the look on Jasper’s face at this she proceeded slower. “It’s a learning robot. It’s more effective than individually programing each possible outcome.”

“Huh,” replied Jasper, uninterested. “That’s really interesting.”

“It’s kind of like a combination of Darwinism and Creationism,” Peridot continued, oblivious. “It’s like I’m the hand of God leading the path of evolution in the direction I want.” She laughed out loud. “But of course, God isn’t real. Only an absolute clod would believe in religion.”

Jasper and Pearl looked at each other uncomfortably. This was the first time that the two had felt the same way about something. She looked down at the star necklace draped down Pearl’s front. Peridot was certainly tactless. Jasper herself hadn’t been to church since the falling out with her father, but she’d still planned to go on mission once she got out of high school. They both decided not to say anything.

Besides that Jasper found Peridot really growing on her. The nerd started to occupy more and more of her thoughts. Honestly, she liked listening to Peridot talk about her interests. Even if she didn’t really care about them herself, it was a nice change to Amethyst’s apathetic nature.

It was Friday night. Jasper was psyching up her team before they ran out to the field.

“Alright boys, this is it. This is the first game of the season. I know some of you like to party, get drunk, get high. Well tonight’s the night. After we wreck the Ocean Town Manta Rays, you have my permission to go nuts. But, if any of you maggots come into practice Monday hung over, I will personally run you around the track until you bleed out your fucking ears.

Listen, I know you guys. You’re strong and fast and smart. Keep your heads down and hit them with everything you’ve got. When we’re done with the season, not only will we have a 14 and 0 record, but we will have crushed the hopes and dreams of any up jumped pansy ass motherfucker who dares step onto the field next to us. We will pound them into the dust till their faces are battered and bloody, our boots will be so far up their asses that they’ll need corrective surgery just to walk again. Am I right, boys?”

“Yes, ma’am!” her team chanted in unison. She felt a genuine smile creep across her face.

“Then what are you waiting for? Get your asses out there, we’re not getting paid by the hour!” The rush of pumped high school boys washed over her, and she turned to follow them. Ocean Town didn’t stand a chance, but she didn’t want the team getting soft. She slipped her helmet down over her head and took off behind them.

It looked like half of the town had come out to watch the match. There had always been a big rivalry between the two towns. The residents of Beach City intended to work their negative feelings out by watching Jasper destroy Ocean Town’s high school football team. Jasper took some pride in that.

As her team set up along the sidelines, she took the opportunity to scan the crowd on the off chance that her mother had come. Of course she didn’t. Jasper was used to it. Someone had told her that there was a talent scout for some university here to watch her play, she didn’t really care. There were already some football scholarships on the table just from the buzz she made in her sophomore year. Not that she’d need them, mom had told her she’d be going to Harvard since a young age. One thing did catch her eye, though. Amidst the sea of school colors sat a single pin prick of emerald. It was Peridot. Jasper grinned and waved.

Peridot was wrapped up under several layers of green sweaters with green scarves and green hats to combat the bitter winter night. She didn’t seem all that pleased to be out in the cold like this, but she waved back as the referee called the teams to the field.

The coin flip was in favor of the Beach City Seals and Jasper couldn’t be happier. They took their positions to receive. She looked around at her men and felt a swell of pride in how smooth practice had gone so far. The kick off, the ball kissed the black sky above them. Jasper fell into the blissful haze of battle.

Touchdown after interception after touchdown after touchdown after touchdown. Ocean Town was being absolutely devastated, not only did Beach City have a star quarterback, but their defence wasn’t giving up an inch. By halftime the score was forty nine to zero. It was an absolute slaughter. Jasper pushed her troops harder against the retreating Manta Rays. They couldn’t be soft, one day they would face off against a team that was an actual threat. She would not let her men learn laziness.

They won, naturally. Ninety one to zero. Adrenaline was pumping through her veins, she felt so powerful. Jasper could take on the world right now. Her team surrounded her, everyone cheering. The constant ringing in her ears and swell of joy in her belly making it impossible to parse what they had been saying. She just congratulated everyone and tried to head off to the girl’s locker room. Wide receiver Kevin stopped her. He asked if she wanted to come to the after party. No, parties are full of alcohol, narcotics, and boys with low inhibitions, none of which are healthy for a growing Jasper. Her body was a temple. She shed layer after layer of hangers on. Until she was alone in the semi-dark lot before the girl’s locker room.

Peridot had been waiting there. All wrapped up and poofy, looking like an overcooked broccoli. She could really go for some veggies right now. She could really go for some Peridot. Her blood was still racing, the only other prospect before her was a shower in the empty girl’s locker room.

Without thinking she ran to Peridot lifting the goober up and spinning her around through the air before setting her gently back down onto the sidewalk. She could kiss her right then and there.

Peridot was smiling. She didn’t say anything but ploofed herself back into Jasper’s chest, wrapping her up into a hug which she reciprocated. Jasper ruffled Peridot’s hair through her beanies with her discolored hand. They stood like that for a while, in the semi dark of the side lot. Peridot must really like her, if she’s willing to put up with her strong sweat stench. Maybe it was pheromones or something. Peridot clearly never wanted the embrace to end, but Jasper had to. Her body was cooling down and the freezing Atlantic night was starting to take its toll.

Jasper gently pushed her away, upon seeing the look in the shorter girl’s eyes she made a decision.

“Peridot, do you want to go on a date with me?”


	4. Olfactory Settings

Amethyst doubled over in laughter when Jasper told her. After she and Peridot had made arrangements and they parted ways Jasper was left in the lonely fluorescent afterlife that was the girl’s locker room. She thought about what might have happened if she simply thrown Peridot over her shoulder and took her in with her. Reality never played out like imagination, besides she didn’t think she was ready for anything intimate with Peridot. She hadn’t been comfortable with the prospect at all since Lapis. No, she wouldn’t think about that now, not when she was feeling so good. One thing was sure, she wouldn’t let that happen with Peridot, she knew better.

The shower she took was long and relaxing. Despite her normal predisposition against nudity, she was feeling pretty proud about her body. It had wrangled her a sweet catch. Or rather, _a_ catch. She dried off before taking the short walk home where Vidalia and Amethyst greeted her. It was late and Onion was off to bed, but Vidalia still held a little congratulatory party anyway, complete with “fun" cake made out of watermelon and assorted other fruits. She appreciated it more than she could say, her substitute family loved her more than she deserved. Jasper felt blessed.

When they retired their room, that was when Jasper told her and Amethyst completely lost it. Jasper waited patiently for the cacophony to cease. It was finally broken by Amethyst, herself.

“I just can’t believe the irony of it, your mom tethers you to a nerd as punishment. Not only are you not bothered, you actually make her into your girlfriend and then take her to the same restaurant your mother berated you at a week later,” explained Amethyst after her laughter fully subsided. “Also, it’s just funny to picture you and her together.”

“Okay, first,” Jasper replied, unable to contain her grin. “I don’t think that’s what irony means. Second, you don’t know Yellow Diamond like I do. She probably intended for this to happen. She’s a master manipulator. Third, going to the Crab Shack was Peri’s idea.”

“Oooh, you guys are at cute nicknames now?” Amethyst teased. Jasper didn’t say anything, just assaulted the tiny woman with a barrage of tickles. She couldn’t help it, she felt so great. She slept more soundly that night than she had in months.

 

Jasper was lying in her bed, it was nine am. She hadn’t remembered ever waking up so late, and it felt awesome. Naturally Amethyst was snoring away below her, unaware of the wonderful day floating around in the morning haze. Jasper looked out of the window to see the sun shining on a beautiful white capped Atlantic Ocean. It was still chilly but the sky was blue. It would probably be the last sunny day till the end of spring. The joyous swell within her wouldn’t let her spend the day anywhere other than the beach.

She jostled Amethyst. The ball of white fur would take some convincing, but Jasper knew she’d ultimately thank her.

 

Jasper was slathered in sunscreen and wore a tight tank top she found at the bottom of her drawer. This was her last chance to show off her physique before June rolled around, and she wasn’t going to waste it. She did this in bitter defiance of the fifty degree weather. It would be painful, but pain was just weakness leaving the body.

Plump little Amethyst emerged from her room wrapped up in a puffy hoodie that only made the girl look more round. She admired Amethyst’s body positivity.

“Sun’s Out, Guns Out?” she asked, reading Jasper’s tank top.

“Hey, it’s a good motto.”

“The sun is barely out, Jasper.”

“Hey, it’s not a gradient. It’s an absolute. The sun is out, ergo my guns are out.” Jasper handed her a glass of fruit smoothie and they both downed the drink before stepping into the light of the low winter sun. They’d hit the south beach.

It was only a few minutes before they were there. It looked like Jasper wasn’t the only one with the idea to spend the day out. She recognized about half of the four dozen or so people who were strung across the beach. When the umbrella and lounge chairs that she had been carrying were set up, Amethyst quickly threw herself down and began to doze.

“Hey, I need to stretch my legs. Do you want anything from the Big Donut?” asked Jasper. A noncommittal grunt was the only response from the sleeping woman. “A half dozen assorted, then.” A grunt of approval and Jasper took off to the east.

Other prone figures passed by, some Jasper knew and some she didn’t. A couple of them called out to congratulate her on the victory last night. She had to remember that they were talking about the football game and not Peridot. A smile and a wave and she was back on her way. The Big Donut was an unmistakeable building, not only for the titular big donut on its roof, but for the wafting scent of body spray that accompanied stepping within twenty yards of the odious fuckboy; Lars.

He flinched when Jasper entered the shop, but Sadie seemed really excited.

“Hey Jasper, nice shirt,” she called from across the room. “What’s Amethyst want today?”

“Just give me six of whatever,” Jasper replied. Sadie got to picking some select frosty donuts from all around the cabinet. “So, Lars. What’s been up with you since last time?”

“Last time we spoke, you choke slammed me into the freezer,” he complained in his whiney cracked voice.

“Oh yeah that was a good one.” Jasper remembered the way his pathetic little body squirmed after she caught him yelling at Sadie. “So I need to do it again, Sadie?”

“Jasper, Lars is a reformed asshole,” answered Sadie. “You should try treat him with more respect.” She plopped a brown bag down on the counter. Jasper pulled out a twenty and slipped it to the tiny lady before grabbing the donuts and turning to walk out of the shop.

“Well, if he gives you any trouble, or you just want to hang out you’ve got my number.”

“I do, don’t I?” she said blushing. “I might just give you a call.”

As she was walking back to Amethyst, something soft struck her hard in the back of the head. She dropped the bag of doughnuts firmly into the sand, and turned around ready to face her attacker. It wasn’t Lars. Four women were standing in a line facing her, a tall black one caught the volley ball that had bounced off of her head.

“Garnet, Pearl, Pizzas,” she acknowledged as the tension left her body, adopting a more cool stance.

“Jasper,” came the acknowledgement from Garnet who was striding over to her unaccompanied. She loved the way her rival pronounced her name in that thick British accent of hers.

“No, go ahead, attack me with my back turned,” Jasper said sarcastically. She wasn’t really upset and was still wearing the smile from the Big Donut.

“We need to talk.”

“Ha, and what could we possibly need to talk about?”

“Peridot.” Jasper tensed up again at the mention of her name.

“Yeah, what about her?” Jasper’s grin was all but gone.

“I know that you two are going on a date.”

“Oh, now how do you know that?” Jasper glanced over at Pearl who was intently watching the interaction. Peridot and Pearl’s relationship must be stronger than she knew.

“I can see the future,” she replied. Jasper thought it was sarcasm, but she could never read Garnet. She waited for her to continue. “I feel obligated to keep the people of Beach City safe from monsters like you,” she said stepping deep into Jasper’s personal space. Garnet was tall, but Jasper still easily looked down at her.

“Oh, so I’m a monster? Spare me, I hear it every day from your little…” she struggled to come up with another mean name to call Pearl. “Your little whatever the hell she is.”

“You are a monster and I won't let you hurt anyone, that includes Peridot.”

“So what are you getting at here? Do you want me to promise that I won’t hurt Peridot?”

“Yes.”

“Okay, I promise that I won’t hurt Peridot,” Jasper replied. What did she have to lose saying out loud something she had already promised to herself? That seemed to satisfy Garnet who turned without a word to her volleyball buds. “Hey Garnet, I just threatened Lars. Do you wanna punish me for _that_?”

“For what, beating me to it? Nice shirt, by the way.” Garnet had earned Jaspers respect more than she would ever admit, and she felt like Garnet might feel the same way. But the ghastly clock floating above their shaky truce was still ticking down.

Amethyst's snoring was scaring away gulls and beachgoers alike when Jasper finally got back to the place they had set up. The smell of donuts woke Amethyst who ravenously dug through the bag without even sitting up. Jasper took to the other beach lounger and slipped on her sunglasses, trying to pretend it was Summer.

 

Sunday rolled around before she knew it. Jasper was fussing over herself before the date. She figured she wanted to go more casual than she had a week ago, but the little black dress was the only article she had other than her school clothes. Jasper decided she’d just wear it with some wool stockings and converse that matched her letterman. That would be casual enough she hoped. God, she felt like she was in middle school. Why was she so nervous?

She spent the better part of an hour applying makeup, there was a certain standard for eyeliner that she felt she’d set too high. She brushed out her long blonde hair and formed it into a soft ponytail tying it with a green scrunchie in honor of Peridot herself. The whole ensemble was complete. This was a proper outfit, and she was looking good.

She took her car out to the restaurant again, there was still enough time to walk but she felt like she’d neglected her baby over the past few months. She’d need to go out for a drive soon. But for now, Adrien would have to sit in the parking lot of The Crab Shack.

Jasper looked at her phone. Still twenty minutes early, might as well wait inside. The matradee looked at her cautiously, clearing remembering her from the previous week.   
“Two, for lunch.” Jasper told her plainly.

“Right this way, Miss Diamond.”

The room was very different from how it had been only a week ago. There were multiple tables, for one, and people at those tables, to boot. Along the walls were the original tacky photos of fishermen and plaques commemorating various maritime accomplishments. Jasper supposed it made the place cozy, but they still looked ugly. The only remnant from their meeting was the piano. It sat unmanned in the corner with the keys covered. They probably thought it was a gift, but the reality was just Yellow Diamond simply discarded things she didn’t need anymore. She did that with people, too.

As the matradee walked her to an empty table she spotted Peridot on the other side of the room. She was gently nursing on a green soda and tapping away on her phone.

“Excuse me, my date is already over here.” She called to the woman who was trying to seat her. She settled down in front of Peridot who tore her face away from the straw.

“Hey daaate,” Peridot rolled the word around her mouth. She was clearly excited to be seen together in public.

“Hey date,” Jasper said matching her enthusiasm. “You’re here early.”

“So are you.” Peridot’s hair was down, out of its ordinary triangular shape. Jasper had assumed that it was a specific style, but maybe it just did that naturally. The scent of hairspray wafted over from across the table. “I like your scrunchie.”

“Oh, thanks,” Jasper reached to her hair and absentmindedly gave it a bit of a tug.

“You smell nice, too,” Peridot added. “And you’re pretty.” Jasper really felt like she was in middle school.

“Hey, you’re looking great yourself,” said Jasper. Peridot with her hair down looked almost respectable. Her garb wasn’t something to wipe your disgusting shattered nose at, either. She actually had an element that wasn’t green, a white dress shirt. She still wore a forest green blazer and matching dress slacks, but coupled with her vibrant green bowtie the whole look actually came together nicely. At the very least she looked more like an eccentric than a weirdo, a fine distinction.

“That’s the first time someone unironically complimented my appearance since I moved here,” said Peridot blushing. Jasper was suddenly washed over by a wave of affection for the short woman. She wanted to punch every person who had ever insulted the way Peridot looked, until she remembered how that exact scenario had gone in the past. Seriously, she had to stop jumping straight to violence, it only solved, like, 50% of her problems.

The waiter came and asked if Jasper wanted something to drink. She only wanted water, and Peridot asked for more soda.

“What’s good here? I’ve never actually been before,” asked Peridot.

“I’m guessing the crab. Personally, I never much cared for denizens of the ocean. Last time I was here I ordered a spring salad.”

“Oh, how was that?”

“Actually, I never got to eat it,” Jasper said embarrassed.

“Sounds like you’ve got a story there.”

The waiter came back to take their order before Jasper would have to think about her mother any more. Yellow Diamond was hardly even a fixture in her life now, but she still haunted every other thought that passed through Jasper’s mind.

Jasper ordered another spring salad while Peridot got some kind of crustacean. Playing it safe, she could respect that.

“So what ever brought you to Beach City, Peridot?” In all their time trying to find a common interest during physics Jasper had never actually asked about her past.

“Well, my parents immigrated here when I was very young. I used to live in Kansas until a few months ago when they moved us.” That was a lot simpler that Jasper had been expecting. “What about you?”

“I was born here. When I was little my parents started to move around for work, but when I got to high school, they moved us back.” She said, trying to match Peridot’s brevity. She supposed she’d have to find something else to fill the time.

“So Jasper, have you ever been with another girl before?” Peridot interrupted her train of thought. Peridot had a devilish grin on her face, like talking about lesbianism was so wicked. Dude, it’s Beach City.

“I have, yes.” Jasper said cautiously. Usually it was bad form to talk about your exes on a date, but it was Peridot that was asking. Was this entrapment? This felt like entrapment.

“So who was she and tell me all about her,” intruded Peridot laying her head in her hands and smooching on her straw again. Yep, this was entrapment. But Jasper didn’t want to lie to Peridot, she read once that honesty was the basis of any stable relationship. She decided to avoid the subject all together.

“I think I’d rather not talk about her right now. We should talk about you.” Peridot looked confused clearly not expecting her questions to have bothered Jasper. She was glad she stopped when she did, it seemed like Peridot wasn’t the type to pick up on social ques. “So have you always been into robotics?”

“Yeah, I’ve been working on computers since before I could remember. They’ve always fascinated me. I spend most of my free time on my computer, trying to overclock my rig, I’ve even managed to make a few bucks on the side cleaning up other people’s bad coding. I used to be on the Robotics team back in Kansas. I was really bummed  when I realized you didn’t have one here, so I started it.” Peridot was smiling. It seemed like she really enjoyed talking about herself, and Jasper didn’t want to take that away from her.

“You know. I’ve never really been on a date before. Is this how things are supposed to go?” She interjected after talking about megabytes for five minutes.

“Yeah, this is normal,” Jasper replied.

“Honestly, I thought there would be more dirty talk,” she said blushing. Jasper laughed involuntarily and immediately felt bad.

“Sorry, I’m not laughing at you. But where did you hear that?”  

“I read a lot of romance mangas.”

“Mangas?”

“Like Japanese graphic novels.”

“Graphic novels?”

“Like long comic books.”

“Huh. Well anyway, dates are usually just talking about yourself.”

“Well, tell me about you, then Jasper. What did you do as a kid?”

“I’ve always done sports, and I was in the scouts once. You know, camping, first aid, tying knots. My dad would always send me away to paramilitary kids camps all over the world during the summer, but I never went to the same place twice so I couldn’t make any lasting friends.”

“All over the world?” Peridot asked, a look of perplexity on her face. “You mean like around Delmarva?”

“No, I really mean around the world. Months in the bush of Australia and East Africa learning survival. A whole Summer in Siberia doing Army drills. Sailing in the Indian Ocean. Etcetera.”

“Wow, you really are as dangerous as you look, aren’t you?” said Peridot stars in her eyes.

“Yeah, I suppose I am pretty deadly,” conceted Jasper a smile forming across her face. They shared a warm silence until it was broken by Peridot.

“How did your family afford to send you all those places? I never got to leave Kansas until I moved here.”

“My mom is uber wealthy.” Peridot seemed to mull over this new information for a while, before being struck with sudden insight.

“Oh Em Gee! Jasper Diamond, you’re the daughter of Yellow Diamond! The queen of the tech industry. This is amazing, I met her just the other day, and I was so excited she decided to give that grant to the Robotics Club.” She gasped, “It was you! You’re the reason she gave us the money.”

“That’s not exactly how I remember it going.” Jasper said rubbing her neck bashfully.

“But I didn’t know she had a daughter. I remember reading a Forbes interview a long time ago, honestly I’ve been a big fan of your mom ever since I was a little girl, and she talked about her family. She mentioned having a son, though. So you have a brother?”

Honesty was the basis of any stable relationship.

 ****  


They were walking out to Jasper’s car with the sun hanging low in the sky. The two of them had spent over four hours in the Crab Shack talking and laughing.  

“This is your ride?”

“Yep, that’s my baby.” Jasper felt some pride swell when she remembered how much work she had put into the car when she got it. “Fully Restored 1970 convertible burnt orange Road/Track B-body Dodge Charger, 440 V8 engine, A833 manual transmission, Nappa leather interior. Classic American muscle.”

“It’s the Dukes of Hazzard car.”

“No, it’s not!” Jasper snapped. “That was a ‘69 Charger. And my Adrien doesn’t have a racist symbol of oppression plastered across its roof.”

“So you named it?” Peridot was smiling coyly.

“So what if I did? Adrien here has more personality than most people do.” Jasper said more playfully, before turning to address the car itself “Poor thing, I haven’t taken you out at _all_ in the last month.” An idea sprung into Jasper’s head. Seriously, why didn’t she come up with it sooner? “Hey Peri, you wanna go for a drive?”

“To where?”

“No place in particular.”

“I don’t understand. Why would you drive without anywhere to go?”

“To enjoy the road, the scenery, each other's company.”

“Uhh... sure, I’ve got nothing else to do today.”

She unlocked the doors and they got in. Jasper was so excited that she was going to show Peridot something she really cared about. They took off down the road out of town, already having a whole course planned out twisting through old highways and forests and fields outside of Beach City. Jasper loved the metallic clacking of the machine she had maintained herself. The extension of her movements through the vehicle made her feel powerful. Like she finally had complete control over something in her life.

“Is that a tape deck?” asked Peridot.

“Yeah, vintage. Pretty sweet huh?” Peridot snickered. “Hey why don’t you check the glove box, I keep some tapes in there. You can put on whatever you like.” Peridot flipped open the cover on the hard metal dashboard and unceremoniously began digging through its contents.

“Do you own any tapes that aren’t rap or classic rock?”

“Yeah, I think so. Check in the back.”

“By the way, this collection is very well organized. Ah! The Shaggs? I had no idea you were so Avant Garde.”

“Ehh, Amethyst likes them, but I don’t really get it.”

“Ooh, new future retro.” Peridot popped in the tape and the car speakers started playing fast 80’s electronica. Jasper pumped the engine in time with the music, accelerating them to ninety on the long country road. Jasper felt so important. They flew over hills and tucked around corners. Peridot cheered and screamed at every bend. She was actually having fun.

The song ended and a new slower one picked up where it left off. Jasper adjusted her speed to fit the new tempo. Peridot looked over at her.

“I had no idea this would be so exciting.” Something caught her eye and she turned to face the back seat. “Is that an electric bass?”

“Yeah, me and Amethyst used to be in a band; the Kindergarten Warriors.” Jasper said sheepishly, looking in the mirror at the long black case that lay across the seats. While Jasper kept the front of the car spotless, she still used the back to hold her personal belongings. As much as she felt accepted by Vidalia and her family, she never slept soundly unless she knew she could pack up and leave in less than an hour. Besides, there were some things that she wanted to keep safe.

“What else have you got back there?”

“Hey, feel free to check it out for yourself.” It was a brash decision, but she was feeling so comfortable around Peridot.

Disregarding any formalities Peridot unbuckled herself and climbed in between their seats, straddling the console.

“You’ve got a case of medals.”

“From old sporting events, yeah.”

“Damn, it’s really messy back here,” Peridot criticized.

“You don’t have to go through my things if you don’t want to,” Jasper replied.

“But I do. Nice throwing knives.”

“Aww thanks, I used to be pretty deadly at ten yards.”

“Let’s see, more boxes and boxes and-” Peridot was cut off when the car took a right bend pretty hard. Her body was slammed into the driver’s seat shoving her thigh into Jasper’s face. It might’ve been hot if she hadn’t been wearing dress slacks or Jasper wasn’t trying to keep them from flying off the road. Peridot resettled herself. “Hey, sorry.”

“Nah, it’s my fault. I always forget about that turn.” Having been absolved of her sins Peridot went back to her rummaging.

“Alright. So, you have a framed drawing of Goku back here.”

“Yeah. I love that show. When I was a kid my dad bought me a signed original sketch when we went to Japan.”

“You said you didn’t know what anime and manga were.”

“Still don’t.”

“Jasper, Dragon Ball is both an anime and a manga.”

“Is that right?”  

“Jasper, you like anime,” Peridot faux-accused. They shared a warm laugh.  “Let’s see, boxes and boxes… is this a gun?”

“Did you find my P08? Hey, be careful with that!” Peridot swung around and sat back down in her seat inspecting the Luger in her lap. Jasper grabbed it out of her hands before she hurt herself. “This thing should be in it’s lockbox in the trunk.”

“Sorry, I’ve never seen a gun this close before.”

“Alright, rule one about guns, always treat them as if they’re loaded.” She said pulling out the magazine and checking the chamber with one arm. “Alright, it isn’t. But you still can’t go waving it around like that. Rule two: never point them at anything you don’t want to kill.” Jasper handed it to her, and Peridot took the gun back. She looked really spooked by the thing, but she couldn’t seem to take her eyes away. There was a silence.

“Can we go shoot it?” asked Peridot sincerely. Jasper had not been expecting that at all. She had to consider the question. Peridot had proven herself conflict averse. She fainted at the sight of blood and couldn’t stand violence. Why did she want to go shooting? Was it the same reason she liked Jasper? Was it a “bad girl” thing? This bore further consideration.

They pulled into an abandoned lot that had already been set up as a makeshift gun range. Red necks liked to shoot at logs. This was one of the many nests built specifically for that purpose, which Jasper knew about in these woods. This far into the forest no one cared about noise or safety.

“Woah, what else do you have in there?” asked Peridot when Jasper opened her the trunk to get her equipment. “I used to collect World War One antiques. Well, I still do. But I don’t have room for any more stuff right now. Come over, check it out.”

“Is that a flamethrower!?”

“Flammenwerfer, yes. But I don’t keep any napalm in my car for obvious reasons. So don’t get too excited.”

“Stick grenades, pickelhaubes, flags, posters, uniforms. Jasper, you’re so cool!” Peridot’s face turned red, “I mean, I had no idea you were such a history nerd.”

“Hey, it’ll get dark soon. We don’t wanna be shooting at things we can’t see,” said Jasper turning away to try and hide her own blush. She mindlessly loaded bullets into the clip as she spouted out rudimentary gun instructions. “Here’s your safety, don’t rely on it. If you drop the gun, do not try and catch it, you’ll just shoot yourself and get suspended from playing for the Empire City Giants. Don’t worry if you don’t hit anything, it’s a lot harder than it is in the movies. If you see anything moving on the range stop immediately, I don’t care if you think you saw a twenty point buck, just stop.” She prattled on, hoping Peridot was taking all of it in.

They stood at the other end of the field, and Peridot was giving the stink eye to an unsuspecting dead dogwood. She traced the muzzle of the German pistol up the trunk, arms and body stiff. Suddenly she let loose a single shot that knocked her on her ass with a loud “ _eep_!” Jasper couldn’t help but find the whole display cute. She went over to help her date up out of the dust.

“You’re too tense. Bend your knees and arms.”

“Did I hit it?”

“No.”

“Drat!”

“Listen, your form is just terrible,” she stepped up behind th1e small gunhaver. “You need to hold it like… here like this.” She placed her hands over Peridot’s and pulled them closer to her chest. “And your hips need to be lower.” Jasper leaned in pushing the little woman down into an athletic stance. “Now your shoulders need to be more relaxed and you’re breathing too hard. No, ke-” Jasper was cut off as Peridot tilted her head back and placed a little peck onto her lips. Jasper didn’t realize how just intimate she had made them by trying to adjust Peridot’s terrible form. She smiled, but only reciprocated the gesture by saying: “Keep your eyes down range, soldier."

Peridot got better with each magazine she emptied at the other end of the field. She was almost hitting the tree by the time it got too dark to keep shooting. It wasn’t too dark for a quick photo session, though. She got a few priceless snapshots of Peridot holding the gun like James Bond, she really looked the part with her weird suit and bowtie. They also got a few of them together before Jasper locked up the deadly weapon where it belonged.

They drove out to a scenic overlook closer to Beach City, and lay down on the hood silently watching the stars emerge as the last sliver of sunlight sunk below the sea. The lights of the town below began to come to life. A chilly breeze floated up from the ocean. Peridot curled up into Jasper’s side. This time they were prepared to keep the embrace for as long as they wanted, wrapped in their winter clothes combined with the heat radiating off from the engine of the car. Cold salty air with thousands of lights above and below setting a beautiful scene.

The last time she was here it was with- no she didn’t want to ruin this moment by thinking about that. Instead she just listened to the soft rhythmic breathing that emanated out of Peridot. It wasn’t a bad sound by any stretch. Melodic, almost raspy towards the end, much like her voice. That unique voice caught halfway between a pack of cigarettes a day, and a first trip to Disneyland.

They lay like that for half an hour before Peridot broke the silence.

“Do you think there’s something else out there?” Peridot asked. Jasper wasn’t ready to answer that question. She didn’t have to. “I don’t. There’s a boy who was in my History class last quarter who was convinced that there was.” Jasper remained silent, realizing there would be more to the story. “He was also convinced we were destined to be together, and he wouldn’t stop hitting on me. You know, like in that weird way creepy socially awkward boys do, where they’re not outright saying anything. They just talk about how nice they are and try and drive themselves into your life. Like you can’t just reject them because they never actually explicitly said anything?”

Like how you flirt, Peridot?

Jasper nuzzled the top of her date’s head, breathing in the deep fruity smell of her hairspray that masked the scent she actually sought. The girlfriend scent that she missed so much.

“Eventually he started following me around. It never got to actual threats of violence but he sure made me uncomfortable.” Jasper made a mental note to take Ronaldo’s lunch money. “He stopped when I started hanging out with Pearl. We had similar interests and similar backstories so we just kind of clicked, you know.” She took in a deep breath, still staring determinedly up at the stars. “I’m not stupid, I know you have a beef with her or Garnet or whoever. But, I’m not going to give up my only other friend just to date you, Jasper.”

“I wouldn’t have it any other way,” Jasper replied. She was glad Peridot would stand up for herself, it jived better with her own personality.

“Good.” Peridot was quiet for a while after that. They were warm and comfortable and surrounded by beauty. Neither wanting to break the spell. After true night had fallen Peridot spoke again. “Is it too early to say I’m in love? I always hear about people saying it too soon. I don’t really get it, it’s just a feeling. A word. A saying.” Peridot yawned. “I mean, I like you a lot. But when does _this_ feeling begin to mean _that_ word?”

“I’d give it at least till the third date,” Jasper teased. Peridot turned to look her in the face. There were so many emotions in that little pouty face of hers. She had no idea what Peridot was trying to convey, if she was even trying to convey anything at all. She just looked back through the darkness into the eyes she knew were green. They both leaned into each other's kiss. It was their first proper one. Not like the quick peck they shared before. It was clear Peridot didn’t really know what she was doing, but Jasper had expected that. It was over quicker than either of them had planned and Peridot resettled deeper into Jasper’s warm embrace.

More time passed and Peridot’s breathing became slower and steadier. The little goober had fallen asleep in her arms.

 


	5. Carrion Nerd

Jasper felt like she could have joined Peridot in her slumber. But, without a third, larger woman for _her_  to rest on, the hood of a 1970’s American car wasn’t exactly a soft bed. Besides, she had responsibilities. Still, she didn’t want to wake her girlfriend up. Was Peridot her girlfriend yet? Better save it till at least the third date. She scooped the little nerd up in her arms and slid down off of Adrien. Peridot was a surprisingly deep sleeper and didn’t stir at all when Jasper buckled her down into the passenger’s seat.

They took off back to town. She didn’t meet any other vehicles on the road, so she took her time, hitting the curves soft and smooth so as not to jerk Peridot awake. When she got to one of Beach City’s dozen or so traffic lights, she checked her phone. It was only ten thirty. It felt like they’d been out all night. She realized she didn’t know where Peridot lived. Shit. She pulled over and set the car in park.

“Peridot, where do you live?” She shoved the girl, then a little harder.

“Just take me home...” Peridot mumbled.

“But where do you live?”

“Ask someone else,” and that was that. Peridot was already fast asleep again. She’d have to try calling around. Jasper couldn’t bring herself to bother the dozing Peri anymore.

Who would know? Her mom, probably. Pearl. She’d have to call Pearl. She didn’t know Pearl’s number. Shit. Who _did_  she know? Sadie? Jasper stepped out of the car and rung up Sadie.

“Hey Jasper,” responded the staticy voice of the donut girl. Curse the reception in Beach City.

“Hey Sadie, so-” began Jasper before being cut off.

“So I was wondering if you wanted to go see a movie on Tuesday?” came a rushed proposition from Sadie.

“Oh. I’m kind of busy… all the time.” Jasper had an away game on Saturday.

“...”

“Uhh… do you know Pearl’s phone number?”

“What? Pearl? Yeah. It’s uhh... No, I don’t have it.” Jasper rubbed the bridge of her nose. A bad idea, it still ached. “I have Garnet’s number, she’d have Pearl’s,” Jasper grinned sardonically, this was just getting better and better. Sadie rattled off the digits and Jasper put them into a new contact.

“Hey, thanks a million Sadie. You know, I might be free to catch a movie on Sunday. I think my girlfriend might want to do something though... Sadie?”

“Oh girlfriend, well you two just have a grand old time together then,” said Sadie before she hung up on her. Wow, in retrospect that was pretty transparent. Jasper was getting really rusty at picking up on these things.

 

She selected her new and unnamed contact.

“Hello Jasper.” Alright, there was no way Garnet could have reasonably known that it was her. Who gave her Jasper’s number? Why didn’t they give her Garnet’s? Jasper had been neglected by the social net at school before, but this dug especially deep.

“I assume you know why I called.”

“I don’t know. But I could make an educated guess. You and Peridot got drunk. You didn’t find out where Peridot lives before she passed out, so now you’re calling around to get Pearl’s number, so that she can tell you.” Well, she wasn’t entirely wrong.

“Alright first of all, I don’t drink. My body is a temple. Second of all, I resent the implication that if I did, you think I’d endanger everyone’s lives by drunk driving around in a V8.”

“Jasper, your body is a temple to a false God.”

“Now that’s just religious persecution.”

“...”

“...”

“...”

“So are you going to tell me Pearl’s number or what?” Garnet did and they hung up without another word.

 

“Pearl speaking.” Pearl’s voice was almost as beautiful as Garnet’s. Determined, sharp and to the point. If they hadn’t had such rocky relationships between their mutuals, she could easily see them being close. “Hello is anyone there?”

“Hey Pearl, it’s Jasper.”

“...” It seemed like this was the night of dead air. “Who gave you my number?”

“It was Garnet. Hey, sorry to bother you so late but Peridot fell asleep and I don’t know where she lives.”

“Garnet? Why were you talking to Garnet?”

“To get your number.”

“Why did you want my number?” Jasper was running out of patience really fast. After getting Pearl’s number she had briefly considered messing with her, it wasn’t supposed to be the other way around. The sad thing was, Pearl probably wasn’t even doing it on purpose.

“Pearl, are you feeling alright?”

“Hm? I’ve just been having a bit.”

“A bit of what Pearl?”

“...”

“Pearl, where does Peridot live?”

“...”

“Pearl?”

“I don’t know if I should tell you.”

“Peridot said it was okay.”

“...”

“Garnet said it was okay.”

“Oh, good then.” Pearl then proceeded to list off  the same address a couple times in a row. Jasper just kind of had to assume she was right.

 

She pulled up before a dark house. She tried to wake her companion up again to tell her to they were there. Peridot just grumbled something about carrying her inside. Fine. Actually, it really was fine. Peri didn’t really weigh that much at all. She rang the bell but got the feeling like there wasn’t anybody home. She waited a few minutes before resigning herself to fish around in Peridot’s pockets. Luckily her house keys were in the front of the blazer she was wearing, so Jasper wouldn’t have to reach into Peridot’s pants. She seriously didn’t feel like their relationship was at that level yet. The key fit, confirming that she was indeed at the right place. She unlocked the front door and stepped in. It took her a few moments to adjust to the low light of the interior.

The house had the smell of someone else’s lives, and it looked that way too. The decorum was sparse, but broken in. There was a large TV on one side of the living room across from a small glass coffee table and hard looking couch. A scatter of various green electronics sat on one side of the table, probably belonging to Peridot. Next to the electronics was a note. Jasper picked it up and tried to read it by the street lights spilling through the window.

 

To: Peridot.

We’ll be gone for three months or longer.

Do the Laundry.

From: Mom.

 

It was debatable which of them had worse parents. She’d need to find out more about Peri’s family life before coming to a definitive conclusion. But hey, if the system worked.

Jasper suddenly felt bad about reading the note, she needed to keep her eyes to herself.

 

Jasper went from room to room trying to find where Peridot slept. In the stillness of the house she finally noticed just how loud Peridot’s own snoring had become. It was seriously jarring. As much as she felt for the girl, the noise was really getting on her nerves. She didn’t know if she could have two snorers in her life simultaneously.

She finally found a room that fit Peridot’s personality profile. Green twin bed. Green desk. Stacks of technology, organized neatly on a broad scale, but messy when contained in their own pile. Posters that had big eyed cartoons and Japanese text on them.

She suddenly felt hesitant. This was Peridot’s room. A private place. Even though Peridot had been considering professing eternal love for her a few hours ago, did she really just want her just barging in? The couch downstairs looked like it might take someone’s back out. She wouldn’t put her worst enemy on that. Well, Garnet would probably like it, but still. She resolved to put Peridot in bed and just get out, without disturbing anything.

She strode briefly across the room and lay Peridot down on her bed. She was still out cold. She should at least take her shoes off, but that would be it. Then she’d just get out, and check in with her in Physics tomorrow. Alright, maybe she should undo that cute bowtie. Passing out with such a tight collar could be a real breathing hazard. And those glasses had to go, too. Well, she couldn’t go this far without tucking her in, could she?

Jasper looked around for a comforter that she found at the foot of an end table behind her. She quickly covered Peridot in the blanket and took her leave from the housebreaking.

 

Jasper told Amethyst about how her date went. She only seemed interested in the parts Jasper didn’t want to tell her about.

“Aww, why don’t you ever take me out to degrade your antiques?”

“Because you never asked.”

“Well, you two sound like the perfect couple. Aww no, don’t look at me like that. I mean it. Seriously, thinking about you guys is getting me all h’eched up inside.”  
“You slay me, Amethyst,” Jasper responded, giving her friend a playful push. Amethyst’s expression took on an uncharacteristically serious look.

“That reminds me. Onion stole one of your things.”

“That’s not new.”

“Yeah, but it was that figure Peridot made of you. I can tell it meant a lot to you.”

“Huh, did he say why?”

“He said something about a debt you owed, or some nonsense. Listen, he’s my brother, and that makes him my responsibility.”

“Responsibility? Are you feeling okay Amethyst?” The short girl scowled at that.

“Just let me get you the toy back, alright? Here, take something that I care about as collateral.”

“Amethyst, you really don’t need to-” Jasper was cut off when Amethyst stuck two long wooden dowels into her hand. “Your lucky drumsticks? Gee, Ame… I’ll keep them safe.”

“Hopefully you wont have to for long.”

 

Monday went by more smoothly than she had expected. Rose handed back their first assignment. She couldn’t even remember what it was about, but she had gotten a B+. She tried to thank Garnet during Art class, but she was too busy ignoring her. Jasper just decided to thank Pearl instead who simply scoffed at the kind words.

“I was doing it for Peridot’s benefit not yours.” That was to be expected. She didn’t understand why she didn’t hate Pearl more. Especially given the history that she and Amethyst had. They had absolutely no reasons to like each other, and Pearl didn’t seem to have any hang ups on the issue. But Jasper just couldn’t really get worked up at someone like her. Maybe growing up in a mansion made her sympathetic to servant types.

Peridot walked into Physics healthy and awake as ever. She would have already known that had they eaten lunch together, Peri explained. Jasper had been skipping her lunches to get some quality gym sessions, to try and make up for the bite robotics made into her free time.

“You wouldn’t want me to lose this hot bod, huh babe?” Jasper teased.

“Honestly, I wouldn’t know what I’d be missing,” Peridot said, slumping her face into her hands.

“Peri, we’re already taking this really fast. I know this is your first time and all and I really want this,” Jasper took Peridot’s hands away from her face and making her straighten up. “But we need to keep things slow.”

“Jasper, it’s just…” Peridot was blushing and her eyes darted around the room looking for something to say. “It’s just… you’re so hot, Jasper.” Now it was Jasper’s turn to blush. She was used to being called attractive, just not so recently. It was weird being brought back to a different time.

Still, that was a weird thing to say. Peridot wasn’t getting more tactful anytime soon. Jasper endeavored to change the subject.

 

Pearl and Peridot were huddled around a laptop again. Jasper watched their backs as she filed her nails waiting for something to do. Amethyst once told her that Vidalia told her to only swipe the emery board one way across the nails. Jasper didn’t really believe that going back and forth would cause damage, but there was no harm in the habit. Before her mind could wander any further she heard Pearl’s voice pick up drastically.

“You’re telling me that’s supposed to be a comma!”

“Hey, it’s just a typo, Pearl.”

“Just a typo! That typo multiplied our need for hybrid L frames by a thousand! A thousand, Peridot! Do you know how big a thousand is?”

“Pearl,” Peridot’s face was turning red. She puffed out her cheeks as she searched for the right words. “I- I don’t like it when you talk to me like that.”

“Well I don’t like the fact that we need to process hundreds of titanium sheets just because some idiot couldn’t figure out how to type right!” Peridot started shaking at that, but Pearl didn’t let up. “We’re going to need to spend dozens of hours just laser cutting all of that raw material! Material that we don’t _have_  need I remind you? Even with expedited shipping we won’t get them until Friday! And because you’re stupid and your goals are impossible, we need to have them all ready by Monday.” Peridot was shaking even more violently now, it seemed uncontrollable. Jasper made a decision.

“Pearl, I’ll stay late on Friday and process the parts, okay?” she said in her most authoritarian voice. Pearl was fuming too, but she gave a curt nod. “Now go, walk it off!” To Jasper’s surprise she did just that, and they were left alone in the room. Jasper; Peacemaker. She would have giggled at the thought had she forgotten the state Peridot was in.

She turned to Peridot, still shaking with rage, tears welling up in her eyes. God, she didn’t know what to do. All her training from years in boot camps taught her to hide her emotions and yell at anyone who didn’t. But she got the feeling like telling Peridot that she dishonored her entire unit wouldn’t exactly improve the situation here. How did she help people deal with emotions? Did she know anyone who was good at this sort of thing? Not really. What did people do in movies to help their friends when they were mad? Were there even any movies about that? She could only remember one.

“Go ahead, hit me as hard as you can. You know I can take it. Just let it all out.”

“That bitch!” Peridot wasted no time beginning her assault on Jasper’s stomach. She was really cutting loose. “She doesn’t! Augh! She knows that! Mother fucker!” Peridot’s wails became increasingly incoherent as she pounded harder and harder against Jasper’s abdominals. Sure, it hurt. But the sight of Peridot running out of steam made it worthwhile. Eventually her shouts gave into sobs and she buried her face into Jasper’s chest. Jasper wrapped her up in a soft embrace. She was crying so hard that she couldn’t get enough air. Each breath punctuating a brief pause in the sound that reverberated around the tool shop. Jasper really envied her in a way, it sounded like Peri was getting a lot of emotional work done.

Still, she really didn’t know what to do. Jasper just rubbed the back of Peridot’s head and tried to whisper calming things.

“You okay?” Jasper asked once the heaving subsided. Peridot just cutely shook her head, face still buried in Jasper’s front. Alright. Long silent embraces were really becoming a running theme in their relationship.

But, what was that about? Something about what Pearl said had really hit Peri’s berserk button. Was it that she was accusing Peridot of wasting their time? No, she’d done that before. Maybe was it the insulting of Peri’s intelligence? But she was so smart, why would she be insecure about that? Was today just a bad day? Ehh, it didn’t matter. What mattered was Peridot was upset with her best friend and Jasper knew it needed to be righted, but Pearl never came back. Maybe sending her on a long walk was the wrong idea. Eventually Peridot began to talk.

 

Jasper called Pearl after practice that night. Luckily she didn’t need to run any players around the track till their ears fell off, or whatever it was she said. Jasper had really expected her to let it go to voicemail; but, despite knowing who was calling, she picked up.

“Pearl speaking.”

“Hey, Pearl. We need to talk about what happened earlier today.”

“I suppose we do, Jasper.”

“The way you blew up at Peridot wasn’t okay at all. What you said was completely inappropriate. Like, you knew how sensitive Peridot about her intelligence. I mean, I didn’t, but you did.”

“So what? Why are you calling me?” It was getting harder and harder for Jasper to keep her cool.

“I’m calling to tell you to be an adult and apologize, or make things right, or whatever,” she said through gritted teeth.

“Ha, like I’m going to listen to what you have to say.” Yep she definitely hated Pearl. Why was there ever any doubt?

“Alright Pearl, what do you want to hear? You’re one of Peridot’s best friends, and what you said really hurt her.”

“What would you know about not hurting people, that’s all you do, Jasper.”

“You don’t fucking know me, alright!” Jasper yelled into the phone. “We’ve never exchanged more than a few words, and I’ve never done anything to you. But you still treat me like shit. You think you’re part of what me and Garnet have going, but you’re not. You prance around acting like you’re important, but you’re worthless without someone to tell you what to do and how to feel. You’re just a shitty broken defective lackey!” There was just silence on the other end. But the screen said she hadn’t hung up yet. “All I ever knew about you was that you hurt my best friend real bad a long time ago. But you know what? I never treated you like I _thought_  you deserved, because I wanted to give you the benefit of the doubt. Now, I hoped we could put whatever there was behind us for Peridot’s sake, but I guess you can’t. And after seeing how you treat your friends, I’m fucking glad.”

She hung up and punched the nearest thing. It happened to be a metal field goal which hurt her hand. Ugh, she couldn’t just leave things like that. Yelling at Pearl might have jarred her into action or it might have just fucked up her and Peri’s relationship irrevocably. Jasper reminded herself for the fiftieth time that she didn’t know what the hell she was doing. She shook out the ringing pain in her palm and called another number.

 

“You want me to tell Pearl to apologise to Peridot?”

“Yes.”

“I will.” Jasper felt a weird mix of emotions at that. Triumph mixed with respect, mixed with relief.

“Yeah, us big girls gotta look after our little women. Right? Hello?” Garnet had already hung up on her. Ugh, whatever. At least things would be settled. Pearl would listen to Garnet. She should have made Pearl promise not to hurt Peridot, not her.

 

Tensions were high in the club the next day, but it looked like Pearl and Peri skipped the silent treatment stage. Jasper didn’t really know what Garnet had done, but it seemed to work, sort of. While their usual banter was nonexistent, at least they would still discuss club duties. Peridot was even more open with Jasper during physics than normal. She guessed that consoling her made them closer. It made sense, it showed trust to let someone gut punch you repeatedly. Despite this she really didn’t want to talk about what was going on between her and Pearl. Jasper supposed she would have to respect that, in the same way Peri had respected her own right to not talk about Lapis.  On the other end, Peridot seemed really glad that her little outburst didn’t turn Jasper off of her.

“Hey, it happens to everyone,” Jasper told her on Wednesday.

“I severely doubt that. Usually when I’m that emotional in public, people don’t want anything to do with me.”

“Well, most people are hypocrites, to be honest I really admire how you can be that open. I haven’t been able to cry since I hit puberty. Aww, don’t look at me like that, I’m not bragging. It’s horrible not being able to cry, all your bad feelings just ball up inside you and then fly out all at once.”

“Like a super nova.”

“Yeah...”

“So are you really going to spend Friday night cycling a thousand sheets of titanium through the laser cutter?”

“I said I would.” Jasper had an away game Saturday night. It would be interesting to see how she fared having had no sleep the night before.

“Then I’m going to come too. We can take turns, hang out, kiss some more, take things slow.”

“Okay.” Jasper couldn’t see anything wrong with the prospect of a girly sleepover in the machine shop. She originally didn’t have much of a plan to make the experience any less aggravating, but she supposed that sometimes these things just work themselves out.

 

Friday rolled around quickly, and Jasper was about to finish up football practice when she heard her phone ringing from her bag on the sidelines. She rushed to get it, but fumbled with the zippers. She eventually ripped the phone out of from the bottom of the bag and answered it without looking at the ID. There was only one person it could be anyway.

“Hey darling, just getting ready to call practice. Do you want me to take a shower, or do you like me all stinky?” she asked coyly.

“I’d prefer if you’d take a shower, to be honest.” That wasn’t Peridot’s voice.

“Oh hey Pearl.” Jasper didn’t have time to be embarrassed or vindictive on account of how confused she was.

“Sorry to bother you,” Pearl cut in quickly. “It’s just that I was trying to get your attention from the bleachers over here for ten minutes but you were so focused on your footballing you didn’t notice.” Jasper’s gaze traveled up the rows of bleachers until it stopped on a little thin waving woman. Pearl was dressed snugly for the winter night and had a thick backpack over one shoulder. Jasper gave a little wrist waggle before before turning back to her mobile phone.

“So, what did you want me for?”

“I’d rather speak to you in person.” Pearl was already bounding down the aluminum steps to a rhythmic clatter. Jasper just folded her arms and watched as the dancer made her way to the grass.

“So, what did you want me for?” Jasper repeated.

“Okay, so I’ve been thinking a lot about Monday.” She waited for a response that Jasper that didn’t give. “And I just wanted to say, I was sorry… about how I’ve treated you in the past and how I acted specifically to you that day.” There was a long pause during which Jasper considered her options.

“I’m sorry, too,” she said, suddenly aware of just how deep and gravelly her voice sounded. “I said some really shitty things.”

“Well thanks, but I wanted to make it up to you and Peridot. So, I’m going to join you guys tonight. Help with all the tedium.” Of course Jasper wouldn’t be able to just enjoy a nice romantic night in with her prospective girlfriend, why did she get her hopes up?

“And you talked with Peridot about this?”

“Oh, she suggested the idea.” In all the romantic rush Jasper had forgotten about who she was dealing with. The verdant dynamo, unpredictable, irrational. What was Peri’s game here? For all Jasper knew she might honestly just be trying to have a slumber party with her two best buds. It must get lonely sleeping in that house all alone. On the other hand, it was possible she expected the event to turn into a debauched lesbian orgy, because she read about in a comic book. Peridot was more of a wildcard than Jasper had been giving her credit for. “Jasper?”

“Sorry, I spaced out there for a second.”

“I’m not socially blind, Jasper. I understand how my presence might bother you. I can go home or…”

“No. Peridot wants a slumber party, let’s give her one.”

 

They knocked on the door to the machine room, and were almost immediately greeted by a special edition sleepytime Peridot. The little woman was wearing an incredibly oversized lime green tee shirt with the words “i’m gay and also a furry” across the front, all lowercase. She probably made that herself. Jasper assumed she was wearing shorts underneath. Jasper hoped she was wearing shorts underneath. It suddenly occurred to Jasper that this was the first time she’d seen Peridot’s bare legs. They were incredibly well groomed, with no hair at all. She didn’t take Peri for someone who shaved their legs. She didn’t take Peri for much, besides a cutie.

“Hey y’all,” called an excited Peridot. It was almost like Monday’s fiasco never even happened.

“Hey, crackerjack,” Jasper said, stepping up to her on impulse. She took Peridot into a quick embrace and kissed her forehead. She was genuinely excited for tonight, she had a feeling like it would wipe away a lot of bad feelings. Peridot was breathing in deeply. It seemed like she made the right decision by not showering. Showering was always a bad decision.

Suddenly they both remembered Pearl who was still standing in the door and looking awkward.

“Hey, sorry. We’ll try and keep the PDAs to a minimum,” said Jasper to the result of a crestfallen look spreading across Peridot’s face.

“I don’t mind, really,” Pearl replied, obviously minding. “Uhh, Peridot, don’t you think we should be wearing shoes in the shop?”

“What? I vacuumed the place like twenty times. We’ll be fine.” As much as Jasper trusted Peri, she didn’t want to lose her life’s dream to a stray nail. Peridot could fuck up her feet if she wanted, but Jasper still wanted to be able to play football tomorrow. She resolved to keep her shoes on.

 

It did look like Peridot had spent a lot of time getting the place ready for human living. All the tables were pushed up against the far wall. The first thing that caught her eye was a large distilling rig made out of appropriated chemistry equipment, that ended in a large thick pot of impossibly black coffee. A few feet away there was an ample supply of chips, cookies and other assorted junk food piled and a stack of red plastic cups. Under the tables was a large cooler, that Jasper could only imagine was filled with poison. In the center of the room were three thick air mattresses covered in gratuitous blankets. An aluminum space heater was just off center, keeping the room toasty against the bitter Atlantic winter that silently waited for them outside. Peridot had even organized the giant pile of titanium panels into manageable zoned stacks. Pearl said that it was going to take them over twenty hours to work through all of it.

“Might as well get started,” answered Jasper, who was stopped by Peridot as she moved to start loading panels into the large industrial machine.  
“Hey I’ll get the thing loaded up, you guys go change into your jammies.”

There was no arguing with Peri at that, so the both of them were forced back into the chilly night to the nearest girl’s bathroom that the school had to offer. Ironically the only place available was the locker room that Jasper had so recently neglected. As the only girl on the football team, Coach Smiley gave her the keys.

“Hey, you don’t have a problem with me being in the girl’s changing room. Do you?” Jasper aggrieved as she unlocked the side door, only a few feet away from where she had first asked Peridot out.

“I’m sorry, Jasper,” was the only reply she got from Pearl.

“Hey, I’m sorry too.” Jasper felt bad, she shouldn’t have brought it up at all. “You know, I’ve always respected your whole fencing thing,” she said trying to make conversation as she opened the door. “It’s not how I… would do things, but it you seem really talented. I can really respect good athleticism.”

“Thanks,” Pearl responded awkwardly as they walked into the dark locker room. The lights suddenly blinked on as the motion sensor switch activated. “I have always considered you very... athletic too.” It wasn’t much of a complement but she clearly meant well.

Mercifully they got changed in different locker rows. Jasper had brought her deep orange monogrammed silk pajamas. There wasn’t much else she had to sleep in besides her underwear, and she hadn’t been comfortable with wearing those around Peridot yet, let alone Pearl. She slipped her cross trainers back on and walked over to where Pearl was standing ready. She worked fast. She was a fast person. Pearl was wearing a neat set of cozy flannel with a floral pattern.

They tried and failed to make small talk on their way back.

 

The rhythmic clacking of the laser cutter was perforating the room. It wasn’t too loud, but it might cause someone to lose sleep if they were they were light sleepers. Pearl probably was.

“You guys want some coffee?” Peridot beamed as she produced some mugs from a giant rucksack under one of the tables in the corner.

“Of course,” said Pearl.

“No, can’t drink it,” said Jasper offhandedly.

“Why’s that?” asked Peridot. Crap, she shouldn’t have said anything. Well, honesty is the basis of any stable relationship.

“Religious reasons,” Jasper said bracing herself for a neckbearded tirade that never came. Peridot just looked around awkwardly before pouring two mugs of chemically purified super coffee.

“Well, I’ve got some soda in the cooler over there, so you’re welcome to help yourself.”

“Sorry, I don’t drink soda, nor eat snack foods.” At the aghast look from Peri Jasper added: “Those are for health reasons.” Peridot appeared thoroughly distraught at this obvious revelation.

“Well, I guess that’s just more for Pearl and I, eh?” she said, trying to salvage the situation.

“I have to agree with Jasper here, while I do thank you for the coffee I don’t eat junk food, sorry Peridot.”

“More for just me then.” Peridot looked genuinely hurt, but this wasn’t something Jasper was going to compromise for Peri’s feelings. It looked the same way for Pearl.

 

The three of them sat on their respective mattresses. Peri had really gone all out with the comfort here. She had never sat on an air mattress that was so supportive. The three of them managed to chat fairly amiably for a while. Every twenty minutes or so one of them would have to get up and lug a stack of titanium sheets into the large industrial machine that chugged away in the corner of the room. That person would always be Pearl, she always offered and neither Peridot nor Jasper had felt like being courteous enough to take the honor themselves.

Peridot complained that she didn’t bring enough pillows to support her back. Years of gaming had really wrecked Peridot’s posture.

“Hey, come over here Peri,” said Jasper sitting up. Peridot eagerly plopped herself down into Jasper's crosslegged lap and comfortably leaned back against Jasper’s chest. She just shrugged at the face Pearl made. They must have looked like nesting dolls of lesbianism. At the heart was Peridot’s giant bag of party chips. Some kind of ungodly Dorito Cheeto combo mix. The very thought made Jasper’s stomach flip, but if it made Peridot happy she wouldn’t judge.

Jasper leaned down to set her head on top of Peridot’s, but was met early by her pointy hair. It had a surprising amount of give, this seemed to confirm Jasper’s suspicion that Peri’s hair formed its heavenly isosceles entirely by natural means. Whatever inquisitive mind she had was piqued. She wanted to do some serious tests.

“Babe, would you mind if I brushed out your hair?” Jasper asked as she grabbed a stiff bristled number she kept with the rest of her gym stuff.

“Uhh no, Jaspy. But why?”

“Just something nice to do for my girlfriend.”

“So we’re girlfriends now? What about taking things slow?” Honestly she had been using the term mentally for a long time.

“Fuck that.” Jasper said nuzzling her face into Peridot’s neck who squirmed and giggled at the display.

As if to spite her, Pearl reached into her giant backpack and pulled out a similarly giant bottle of red wine. Any amnesty she might have been feeling towards Pearl up until that point vanished.

 

“Peridot, if you drink any of that, there’s no chance of us doing anything tonight.”

“Jasper, there was never any chance of us doing anything.” It was true enough.

 

Jasper sat as calmly as she could while Peridot and Pearl danced drunkenly around the room. Peridot was incredibly bad at dancing, but to be put next to the classically trained ballerina was just cruel. The sight might have been funny had Jasper not been so upset. She wasn’t mad at Peridot. She wasn’t even mad at Pearl, well maybe a little, but she understood why she brought the alcohol. She was more mad at the alcohol itself for what it represented. She hated the thought of someone losing their self control.

Before she could seethe anymore Peridot tripped up at a skippy beat and fell face first into Jasper’s lap. Peridot’s wine was neatly contained on all of Jasper’s clothes. This had to be intentional, no one ever fucked up so spectacularly on accident. She pushed the drunk girl off of her, who was starting to mumble incoherently. The stain went right down the length of her thousand dollar custom tailored pajamas. There were a lot of bad memories in those pajamas, she’d just have to chalk up one more.

“Geez, Jasper... I didn’t think she’d take to it so hard,” Pearl apologized, stumbling a little herself. Peridot was a real lightweight. Even Amethyst with her tiny frame still held her liquor.

“Now… you’ve gotta take it off! Ha!” called Peridot as she rolled over onto her back. She was right, the slimy feeling of wine soaked silk was unpleasant to say the least. Jasper considered going out to the locker room. Jasper considered leaving. Honestly, what did she have to lose at this point? But that was the exact thing that kept her, the fact that she had nothing to lose. If Peridot really wanted to see her body, she’d give it to her.

She began to unbutton the shirt to the response of cheers from Peridot who had sloppily pulled herself into a sitting position. Pearl wasn’t looking away, either. It was clear she was sloshed, just a bit more of a dignified drunk. Thankfully, Jasper had known she wasn’t going to sleep tonight so she’d remembered to keep her bra and underwear on. Pearl shyly joined Peridot in cheering the utilitarian strip tease. Jasper started to melt a little at that. She always had a bit of a crush on the redhead, but given their relationship she never followed up on those feelings. But now Pearl seemed into her, to some extent. She had to remind herself not to look too far into that. Nothing counted when drunk, at least that was what Amethyst said. It was only a bit of a crush, anyway.

She balled up the shirt and threw it at them to more hollers from her audience. They were like a two person bachelorette party.

“Wow Jasper, you’ve... really taken care of yourself,” complemented Pearl.

“Hey, eyes off she’s mine and I’ve got my stake on her abs. I staked them out over two centuries ago when we were in Spain.” Peridot was the kind of drunk who just spouted garbage. The sheer nonsense of what she had just said was enough to make Jasper laugh despite herself. “Wait where are they, they’re so ill defined and waddly!” Jasper briefly considered giving Peridot a lecture on human anatomy and how unhealthy it was to have super clear abs. Looking like a six pack of soda represented a dangerously low level of body fat. But she’d wait to explain that once Peri was more lucid.

“May I... touch them?” Pearl asked blushing. Wow, she was way more drunk than Jasper realized.

“My tits or my muscles?”

“Do both,” Peridot heckled from her seat, “Then kiss! Kiss kiss kiss!”

“Not gonna happen, Peri. It’s fine, Pearl. Everyone always wanted to touch my muscles when I used to go shirtless. Don’t be embarrassed.”

“ _Shimshon_ ,” Pearl whispered as she ran her cold bony fingers across Jasper’s stomach.

This week was so counterintuitive.

 

As soon as she took off her pants, the hoots and hollers stopped.

 

“What have you never seen a girl with a knee brace before?”

Pearl just spoke something else in a language she didn’t understand.

 

“Me? I’ve… I’ve always had killer legs. My mom would say to me, she’d say to me that I had great… great legs.”

“I suppose that’s true enough, Peridot.”

“Here, you wanna see up all close, baby?”

“You’re drunk Peridot.”

“Yeah and that’s what’s great about my legs they’re still good even when I’m inside my pants.”  
“Honey, why don’t you lie down.”

“I don’t need to... _hicaaaawhhh_ … lie down,” Peridot replied. Jasper was worldly  enough to recognise that sound, she’d heard it dozens of times back when she used to go to house parties. She glanced at Pearl, she heard it too. They only had a few seconds. Jasper just scooped Peridot up into her arms without saying anything. It wasn’t like she was in any fit state to help herself anyway. There wasn’t enough time to run her to the bathroom, so she just kneeled Peridot down in front of the small garden off to the side of the machine shop. Peridot mumbled the whole way, first in excitement at being lifted up, then in protest as the icy bitter air struck them both.

“Why did you do… this?”

“Just wait,” Jasper answered as she swept back the small woman’s hair from her face. As soon as Peridot opened her mouth to say something else, a torrent of hideous orange chunked sanguine vomit projected itself into the flower bed. It looked like nature would just have to take one for the team here. Peri was trying to speak in between waves of bile with increasing desperation.

“-ooh, this it do-”

“-normally happen, don’t worry I-”

“-oh okay, stop pl-”

“-please please please-”

“-it hurts oh it hurts it-”

“-make it stop please kill me-”

“-is that it? Please let that be all. Oh no-”

“-that one wasn’t even anything. It’s not fair. It’s not fair. It’s not fair. I just wanna die. I just wanna die.”

“Hush,” Jasper interrupted her, cradling the sobbing girl for the second time that week. “Come on, let’s get you cleaned up.”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As of the time of writing it has been one and a half years since I last updated Wildebeest. As much as I loved writing this back then, many circumstances lead me to abandon the piece, kept me from returning to it. Indeed, I had genuinely hoped it might quietly disappear, to avoid the embarrassment of leaving on such an unsatisfying ending. Despite this, I really appreciate that it has continued to receive so much support and interest from the community. I had toyed with the idea of releasing my notes and half written chapters in an attempt to give the story some closure, but that felt far too egotistical of me. I choose to leave it finished here, not in the sense that the story has been resolved, but in that it has been cleanly and permanently abandoned. 
> 
> I may write something of this nature going forward, possibly even more Jaspidot. I just believe that I'm too different a person from who I was to really pick this up where I left off.


End file.
